Hey Babygirl.
Mommy loves you so very much you know that right? As much as I wish you could be here, I know that the life you're living up there is far more beautiful than any life you could have lived here.
I think about you everyday, you know? When i wake up and even when I go to sleep. You're always on my mind mama.
Sometimes when I see babies that are the age you would be right now, I start picturing what you would have looked like. Of course I got pictures when you were in Mommy's tummy, but they can only show me so much when I feel sad.
I know sometimes I get sad, but it's not your fault. Actually none of this was your fault and If you ever get sad, I dont want you to think that it was, okay? You know how much Mommy loves you. I loved you before I even met you...
Broken Hearts
Dear future husband,
I can't wait to meet you. I really, really can't. You see I am in a state of unshakable confusion and sadness at this moment... a way of being I have learnt to accept as normal. And I guess I just want to break away from it and come running to you, whoever you may be.
My ex broke my heart a few months ago... he broke it twice actually. Once when he left me for his wife again and more recently when he left her for someone else. I can't stop thinking about him. The way he walks, that smile he gives when he tilts his head to the side, his laugh, the knack he had acquired of making me feel safe in those gorgeous arms and the way he would make me crazy for him.
He was my first love you see... and that's always intense isn't it. It's not so much that he's the...
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Our Dearest Deorr Kunz Jr,
Wow! We are coming up on a year since you have disappeared. My heart breaks for you even though I never knew you. I ask myself why do I feel so deep for this little baby boy who I never even known. Then I hear the clanking of little tiny cars, the rummaging through a toy box full of cars, and I see these tiny little hands holding the cars one by one, concentrating so hard on which car he will whip through the air while making car sounds. This is my baby boy, he has fluffy blonde hair, the cutest smile and a love for cars just like you. This I believe is what draws me into you, and makes my heart ache so desperately for closure. Not just closure for us (the strangers who have fell in love with you), but closure for your innocent family who have without a...
2,817
Dear you,
I remember hearing about you before I had dated him. I remember how he would call me and tell me how you had been screaming at him (again) and I remember how sad and frail he was when I first met him. How we grew into close-knit friends and how he shared secrets with me he wouldn't anyone else. Like that time you had tried to claw at his eyes during another fight or, how you had smacked him across the head with a beer bottle. Don't fret, he's mentioned good times as well. Like that time he tore his shirt trying to help your little sister over a fence because she wanted to go exploring. I remember when he had to leave and you made "love" to another man one week later. How does it feel to know that he smiles bigger and brighter than ever now? How does it feel to know you...
2,540
To you
I know you are hurting and I get that. I am in the same place too.
Trying to summon the strength in your legs to pull yourself out of your bed in the morning, just to sit and stare out of the window for what feels like hours. To find the words to greet everyone a ''good morning'' when all you really want is to be allowed to grieve and jump back into bed. Under the covers where you're safe - where you don't have to pretend.
Your days merge into an endless reel of up's and down's. Not up's as such - perhaps, mid's and low's is a better way of explaining it. Your friends must be sick of looking at your sleep-stolen bags under your tear soaked eyes, and your shoulders which never seem to be able to carry the burdens of your story. They keep telling you ''it'll get better''...
2,600
I just have a small request.
A simple question that has been bothering me for months. It's been lying heavy on my heart and dragging down my shoulders. It's the fear in my eyes and the words I see leave my mind, but never my mouth. It's the dew on the morning grass and the wings on a butterfly. The waving of the trees as they sway in the winds and the roar of a lion so desperate to communicate. It's the worry that lives within me and the beads of sweat that perspire from my face. The grip of my fingers and the creases in my forehead.
You see, I've been told this many times.
'It gets better. It goes away. Over time you will be you again and you'll find the hole starts to fill up piece by piece.'
But the thing that keeps me awake and steals my sleep is this...
Will it?...
2,200
Dear Mr P
You let me go and I get that. I really do. But what if I never love again. What if I never feel those butterflies whizzing round my insides and my head spinning and my hands trembling with passion again? What if this really was it and I have lost it so soon. I don't know how to live my life without you in it. How to walk through life without you as my shelter.
You showed me just how bright and colourful life could be but just as I got accustomed to this, you took it back out from under my feet. You broke the crayonsand rubbed out the colour from my world.
2,698
I know that I have to forgive you, but i can not fucking forget. The harder i try, the worse it gets. So i guess here this goes.
I could go on about all the thing you "told me" and "promised me" but why bother, you should know, afterall you said them. But, despite all the shit we went through, when we found out I was pregnant, which came as no surprise seeing as you did nothing to prevent it, why didn't that mame you realize you needed to grow up? I understand we were babies ourself, 15 years old wasn't the age i seen myself pregnant. But it was all so real and happening. I know we weren't together, and that was okay, it was mutual. But reguardless of all the shit we went through, why leave her? Not her as in me, but her as in your daughter. The daughter that would have loved you...
14,610
Where could I begin?
I fell in love with you three years ago. And these past three years have been the most confusing and complicated years of my life. Luckily, I met you right in the mist of my teenage years, for that I am greatful. Although we did not work out, you have taught me many lessons as well as being my best friend through many hardships.
I realize who you are now is not who I thought you would've turned out to be. It's disappointing who you have grown into.. but I won't hold it against you right now. You're growing; learning.
I will always love you. In a way that is more genuine and kind than romantic. I will always care for you and of course pray for only the best circumstances. Being there for you in your time of loss was hard but also a huge lesson. I hope that I...
2,331
Mr 4,
You came for the interview and you got the job. I remember thinking you looked fun... someone I could take under my wing and teach the shortcuts to! Slowly ws started talking and I realised you were funny, charismatic, brilliant at your job and very much married. Over time we spent more time together and the evenings were spent chatting in corridors and laughing about day. It was only four months into worksheet that you started getting closer to me. Whispering into my ear when you spoke to me, looking deep into my eyes when you listened. A few more months past and you began to feel attracted to me in a way you made very clear. It was my hips that mesmerised you to begin with. You would watch me walk away from you, I could feel your eyes following me, your face light up every...
3,042