Hi Vince,
I hope this letter finds you happy and healthy. I have been thinking and worrying a lot about you Dylan, Hominy and mom lately. This is the first Thanksgiving I spent alone and I cannot describe what a lonely feeling that was. I hope you had a nice dinner and some nice pumpkin pie. This year like every year I gave thanks that I have such a great family and that you are all healthy as far as I know. I heard a rumor mom lost a lot of weight and may have some illness. This worries me a lot because she did not have any weight to lose. So if she is sick buddy, you have to tell me.
If you need money or want something for special for Christmas, please send me an email. If the borders open up before Christmas I will come to look for you as I tried before. I don't know if the...
Family
Happy Birthday Vince!
Today you are officially a man, and I know this day came a lot faster than either one of of thought it would, but it is here, and an ugly world is awaiting your best efforts to make it a better place. After raising you since birth, it was clear to me by the time you were 7 years-old, that you were no ordinary kid. You had no fear but plenty of curiosity and a sense of exploration and a deep desire to learn. You were always hungry for knowledge and I was always proud of you for these qualities. You reminded me so much of myself as a kid, but because I had such a strict father, I was more of rebel than you. And unlike you, I was never able to stay quite when things just weren't right. I was always hoping that you would be like me and not grow up with the passive...
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To all past present and future grandfathers, papaws, grandpas and any other name you may be known as,
Grandfathers, you are special. You are here to help nurture, guide, and protect the precious lives created by your own children. I can only view your role as one of the most influential jobs you can have. There are many things that are to be learned in the time spent with you. These are things that only you can teach. I cherish my relationship with my father more than I could ever even imagine putting into words, but the relationship with my papaw is just different.
My papaw was the second most influential man in my life, behind only my dad. There were many things my dad taught me that I will use every single day of my life. My dad taught me how to tie a tie, how to change a tire,...
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Hi Buddy,
This is by far the most difficult thing I ever had to do in my life, saying good-bye to the one I love most and to this world which has never been, and never will be a fair one for either of us. Knowing that I will never see your smile again or hear your words or share a hug with you is extremely painful, and I can no longer bear this agony every day.
From the day you were born my life changed instantly - and forever. I had waited 40 years for you to come along son, and when you did it it was the best day of my life and one of the most painful for mom (27 hours of labor). For the rest of my life I lived for you. Of course I tried to make your mother happy, trying to buy her everything she wanted, and do whatever she wanted. But seeing you smile, laugh, grown and learn is...
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Fight. Stay strong through these possibly hardest 18 years of your life. A normal family consists of a mom, a dad, and a child or children, however, you are in a position where either the mother or father figure is not in the picture. I know its hard, having to be both a mom and dad at the same time but you are strong enough to get through this. Work for your kid or kids and try to give them a better life than you had. You may get aggravated, stressed-out, or down but remember who you are doing this for. Never and I mean never get mad at your kids for this, it can be easy to blame this on them but they had nothing to do with it.. Give them a full and happy childhood, they are no different than any other kid and they shouldn’t have to be treated like they are. Also, remember that you are...
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Hi Buddy!
I have no clue where you are since your mom won't tell me or give me your real telephone number (and won't even tell me why). But it doesn't matter really. Wherever you are I want you to know that I won't stop loving you, missing, you, nor trying to find you. I hope you received the three letters I sent to you through University of Toronto Registrar's office, although I assumed you were/are at the Mississauga Campus since they would not even confirm you are a student there even though I paid for your tuition.
Anyway, it's Father's Day and I have a special message for you and just wish I could give it to you with a huge hug in person with a special gift I have been trying to get to you for over a year. The message is that I have never stopped trying to be a real father...
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Dear sperm donor,
First I just want to say thank you for walking away not only once, but twice. I was about 13 when I found out about you, and you where the first man that ever made me feel worthless and unwanted. I wondered why I wasn't good enough for you to stick around. I wondered what you looked like and if you ever thought of me. I was upset that my parents had kept it from me for so long, and it took me a long time to realize that they were doing it to protect me and because they loved me.
When I was 18, and I first met you I was so nervous which I don't know why because I owed you absolutely nothing. My mom had asked me numerous times through the years if I wanted to meet you, and I always said no because why? I felt as though if you really wanted to meet me then you would...
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Hi Vince, how are you buddy?
As I sat in the Emergency room of Lennox Hill Hospital recently I was truly scared for the first time in my life. I was scared that this picture of you which was taken the last time I saw you as you departed Beijing International Airport would be the last time I would see your smile. That day was one of the saddest days I had to endure,but not even close to the devastation when your mother told me last Christmas that she had divorced me while I was working abroad. She never once told me she wanted a divorce or was planning to get one Vince. It just came out of the blue as I was on my way to Canada to be with the only family I have for Christmas.
I thought for sure from our last conversation on the phone that it would be a happy and joyous reunion for...
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Dear Confused, Depressed, 12-year-old,
No one has told you yet, but there’s this thing called mental illness. It sounds scary, but I promise you it’s not as bad as you think it is.
You know how you get really sad sometimes and think about dying? Not all people think that way. Those intense mood swings where at one moment you feel like flying and the next you feel like screaming at everybody can’t always be simply “growing up”.
I’m reaching out to you. There’s a whole world full of people just like you and me. We all went through the awful adolescence that is self-discovery. We all wondered why none of our friends had emotions too big to cover up like we did. Some of us suffered quietly. Some of us screamed at the world. Some of us questioned authority at every turn.
We have...
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An Open Letter To The Absent One.
Dear Absent One,
I want you to know I am not angry. I am not upset about the choices you’ve made and will continue to make. If you think I am upset; I assure you— I am not whatsoever. Being a parent is scary business. I understand the unbelievable fear of hearing those two words, “I'm pregnant”. I was terrified myself. Not only hearing those words but hearing “twins” right after REALLY complicated things between us. We all have choices in life, and I happen to make the choice that not only affected me but you as well. Although this is true… I’m happy about the choice that I made. You on the other hand are not, but that’s just okay. It’s normal. I gave you the ultimatum to be in or out. You chose out.
I’m not upset. Rather disappointed, but not...
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