Love Letters

M, I get it now. I do. Our relationship died. And as much as I want you back you don't want to comeback . I don't think it's a matter of me moving on from you or getting over you. I never will. In my heart you are the one who helped me make sense of me and my world. My only task now is to make the most of what is left, both in terms of time and spirit. And in the really tough times I will close my eyes and imagine you are beside me and draw some strength like I used to when I reached out to take your hand, like a child on a dark night. I never will understand why after almost 6 years we could not sit down and discuss what was going on. I will never grasp this urge to run that you have. Be that to run away physically or run inside yourself to hide behind a wall of silence....
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I don't know what makes me write a letter suddenly but I've always learnt I express more when I write and so that's what I am doing. For you. For me. I don't know if you will ever find this letter or even know it's for you but it doesn't matter. You're 15000 miles apart in a different country and probably even enjoying your new life and I am so happy for you that you finally made it :-) I don't know if you realise but we finished one year to our friendship which started rather funnily. I still smile when I recall the first time we met and how I was a kid when u blasted me for nearly hitting you with my bicycle. After that years passed and we met again and this time to become very dear friends. When I became friends with you I knew you'd leave to fulfill your dreams soon but I...
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