Broken Hearts

Alarm Clock Life got in the way of my life it continued to take place even though I wasn’t ready. It kept moving along while I was distracted while I was ignoring and denying it, it moved forward unconcerned and I got older. Not looking at yourself doesn’t prevent it not acknowledging it doesn’t change what has happened. While I was brushing my teeth and shaving my hair turned grey. When I was at the grocery store and the gas station my body began to break down. I aged while doing the dishes and vacuuming and while the washer was running. While I was surfing online and writing emails, my youth ended. You were out, meeting new people, learning how to socialize, I was at home, reading about ancient cultures. You went out on dates, learned about yourself and about others...
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They keep telling me to move on. To get over you. They say that I've been this way for far too long, I just, I don't understand how they expect me to be okay. I confided in you, you were the one person I told everything to, and one day you just decided to get up and leave. You said that we could still be friends, but you and I both know that was a lie, we've talked once since the break up. We talked once 68 days ago, and I was too intoxicated to even remember the sound of your voice from that night. I'm just, I'm not like them, you should know that, you should know that it doesn't take me days, or weeks, it takes me a lifetime, to just get up and forget about the last person I said "I love you" to and meant it. Whoever says that time will heal the broken heart must have never fallen in...
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In everyone's life there are different experiences; one of them is the first love. My first love was dazzling yet aching. Everytime I go back to those memories, my eyes water and I feel like I could have done so much better. My story began 3 years ago, when I was only fourteen. I was inexperienced and naive; I thought that there was no heartbreak in this world. It was the last day of school when I first saw him. His eyes made my heart skip a beat. That first moment when I saw him is engraved in my head. Too bad I didn't knew his name. Summertime came, I opened my Facebook and hunt one of his friends' account to know what his name was. Yeah, you can call me a stalker. That day I was really desperate to know what his name because I was head-over-heels on him. Then one day, God heard my...
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You were the one that I fell in love with my senior year of high school and you were my first love. Boy, did I sure want to spend the rest of my life with you but it's funny how things change. See here's the thing, this isn't to glorify how great our relationship was because it wasn't. We started dating October 2015 and you broke up with me without reason the first week of January because it was right after Christmas. All the clothes I had bought you I got right back because you weren't worth enough. I showed you everything that you said the last one couldn't. You took that for granted, just like you took me loving you and caring about you and making myself miserable for you. I fought and fought to get you back over a series of months, but it was nothing to you. I was nothing more...
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Dear Friend, Thanks. Thanks for leaving me at home alone on another Saturday night listening to sad music while you go out and laugh with the girl that you clearly see as your one and only best friend, even though I was the one who has ever let you cry into my arms. Thanks for letting me down again and again, when I loved you through it all more than anything else in this world. That's right. When I was wrapped up in bed all those hours during the day while you were out having the time of your life, I still loved you. All I ever wanted was for you to be happy; I practically sold my soul to you, and you couldn't care less. Maybe you think this is absolutely selfish, to blame you and your happiness for my melancholy emotions, but I'm not doing that at all. I'm just letting you know...
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It's been some time now since we have parted ways, though the decision was not my own I understand and realize that I was a large cause of it. Time has moved slower than my thoughts it seems, at times it felt like I was a day ahead of where my physical body was presently at. Other days my mind was in the past and some days, although seldom, I lived in the present moment. It was an overwhelming struggle getting to where I am now, as I am also sure wherever you are at has been the same. I am at that point where I am ok with just living life and taking things as they come, sometimes I get a bit of anxiety though wondering where I am going now. I know things between us moved quickly, from meeting to a date, to giving each other a title. Something about you though drew me in like magnets...
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1. You are a LIAR 2. You checked out 3. I was always behind other people. ALWAYS. Not to say I need to be top priority all the time but I was very frequently tossed to the side. 4. You gave up on yourself 5. You gave up on me 6. You gave up on us 7. You give up. Period. 8. You controlled me for too long. You got use to it by the time I started actually fighting back. 9. You made me feel bad about the mistakes I made even though you said you were over it. You should’ve been honest with yourself and me 10. You gave shitty gifts 11. You hated my gifts that. I spent hours putting them together for you 12. If something was negative or not good with me you made fun of it instead of trying to help me through it and fix it 13. You kicked me out of your house when your friends were...
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One day, just like that, you were gone, and before I knew it I couldn't even recognize myself anymore. I couldn't imagine how someone I had given so much to and someone I had cared so much about, and who had cared so much about me could leave just like that. Day after day it was a string of waking up and losing you all over again, telling my friends I was fine one second and crying to them the next. I didn't understand, I'd be perfectly fine and then I would suddenly feel so sad, so heartbroken, and so weak. Weak because I let you make me feel this way and I shouldn't have, but the second I started thinking I was okay, I saw you again. We talked, I cried, you left, I died inside. Seeing you every day makes my heart sink, but I don't deserve it. Realizing that took me longer than I'd...
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One day, just like that, you were gone, and before I knew it I couldn't even recognize myself anymore. I couldn't imagine how someone I had given so much to and someone I had cared so much about, and who had cared so much about me could leave just like that. Day after day it was a string of waking up and losing you all over again, telling my friends I was fine one second and crying to them the next. I didn't understand, I'd be perfectly fine and then I would suddenly feel so sad, so heartbroken, and so weak. Weak because I let you make me feel this way and I shouldn't have, but the second I started thinking I was okay, I saw you again. We talked, I cried, you left, I died inside. Seeing you every day makes my heart sink, but I don't deserve it. Realizing that took me longer than I'd...
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Yes we've all had our hearts broken and we'd never survive it. But as we grow-up we learn it's a part of life and that it's bound to happen many times. And we sometimes even grow from it. As a parent our children even break our hearts by simply not making good choices and maybe not having the life we wanted them to have. But we get do get over and we love them and continue to help them. And the heart heals... But you truly do have a broken heart when you loose a love one especially a child. I can honestly say November 13, 2015 my heart was broken and a piece was lost forever when I got the phone call my 23 year old son was in a car accident with his friend. Never in a million years did I think I would ever loose one of my children before me. I know people die everyday and I've lost...
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