Love Letters

Dear Cali, It's is such a shame I am not there with you.I only get to see you in pictures and on TV my heart flatters just at the mention of your name.I am just a teenage girl with a dream of making it in California.People think it's just an imagination some call it a bizarre dream like that one when you dream you are eating ice-cream then you end up eating your matress.To them its probably outrageous but to me it's a burning desire a passion from the depths of my heart.When that day comes I set foot in the grounds of California my love,I wil be more smitten I will cry to my very last drop because California keeps me going keeps me dreaming keeps me hoping.Eventhough I might be worlds apart I'll climb every mountain I'll swim every ocean just to be there I can't wait I can feel it in...

I knew right from the start that what we have might never come true. I initially didn't like you because of the way you look and because when I met you, I was still grieving from a heartbreak. The guy I was talking to right before you was precious, and I have accepted him for who he is. But all of a sudden, he told me that he knew things would be harder if we continued as it was impossible for us to see each other. Then you came along. You said you liked me and started conversations awkwardly. You would send me photos that had questions listed and we would take turns picking numbers and answering questions. You started flirting with me, and I thought fine, I don't have someone to flirt with anyway. We didn't really have a date for our anniversary. We just said December was when we fell...

Dearest Archangel, As I delve into the deepest and darkest roots of my core, I simply can not grasp ‘the moment’. There's always a moment - a single peak of seeming clarity that usurped my soul and plastered my mind. It’s manipulative and its power was to create a disillusionment that falsely empowered me into believing that I was a strong willed person, capable of making responsible decisions for my own “adulthood”. “I can do this, I can either submit to this treachery, or I can resist and reject this. It’s not a big deal. It’s not as though I’m weak, I’ve never been weak before, why would I start now?”, it tricked me. I assume a similar process consumed my Archangel too. Well, I assumed a lot of things. I believed that we were the same, synchronised in thought, in senses, in lust...

the years we spent together, i spent them thinking you were different. knowing you were damaged from years of childhood abuse, from a toxic mother with a drug problem, from your physically abusive stepdad, from the paranoid schizophrenic biological father you didn't meet until your preteen years. i recognized that you had baggage, that you had more than a lot of people usually do. i viewed it immaturely for a long time. i viewed you as someone broken, but beautiful, someone i wanted to fix. i guess that's the psychology major in me. i should have known that i couldn't have taken it upon myself to "fix you". that i can't fix you. no one can, but you. none of that is your fault, you didn't ask to be born into the situation you were born into. you didn't ask for years of trauma, verbal...