Dear Ladies and Gentlemen of the I.O.C.,
Wake up and smell the Hybrids, folks, it is time to play golf. Time to put this sport back on the Olympic list, to tee it up with the trumpets blaring and the flags flying and the medals-podium looming and nationalism bleeding and braying all over the course. The Olympic credo, "Citius, Altius, Fortius" should be cheerfully expanded to "Citius, Altius, Fortius, Birdius," or loosely translated: "higher, faster, stronger and who has the balls to go for the 18th green in two with the world watching and a gold medal in the balance?"
It could be great, really great and it wouldn't be that hard to do. Might just bring a few more sports fans to the Olympic table, too.
Golf is a huge participant and spectator sport worldwide these days with an...
Sport
Dear BT Sport;
I know that you’re new to this whole sport broadcasting thing, but if you continue to be a provider of Premier League football coverage there is one thing that you absolutely must do. You have to banish Michael Owen from your team. Do not let him represent you by speaking in any way manner or form in a public broadcast again. He is terrible.
They say some people have a face for radio, well Michael Owen has a voice for mime. Aside from his barely veiled bias toward Liverpool and his hard on for Man United, he sounds like what cardboard would sound like if it could speak. He has a voice like the Richard Harrow character off Boardwalk Empire, except that character has a voice like that because half his face has been blown off, which is naturally going to effect the way...
5,657
Dear lads,
HERE we go again. Another September and we rest our dream on your young shoulders. It’s a lot for you to carry on All-Ireland Final Day. But if we can’t trust you, where else can we turn. We’re squeezing the ticket of a lifelong journey into your safe hands for you to get us a travel pass so as we can live a dream.
Who are we? We’re the woman serving the meal at a wedding in the Castlecourt. We’re the kid playing in the schoolyard. We’re the girls on the B shift in Baxter. The exiles in London or Long Island. The five Ballinrobe lads who took off one morning for Australia.
The patient in hospital wearing her Mayo neckband. We’re the mother who worries daily about the price of the school books or the uniform. We’re the fly by nights, the chancers, the sleeveens, and the all...
2,808
Dear Lance,
I realise that you are busy trying to sell your shame at the moment, but with legal action looming I thought I might suggest an out of court settlement.
If you would be kind enough to refund me for the following purchases which were made based on you being a decent human being, and most of all a sportsman:
IT’S NOT ABOUT THE BIKE – 2000 $35
EVERY SECOND COUNTS – 2003 $35
US POSTAL CYCLE SHIRT – 2002 $220
Lance, you owe me $290 dollars.
I believed you when you told stories of the rigorous drug testing regime you endured. I felt sorry for you when you opined the way you were victimised as a cheat.
I know you weren’t alone, only a fool would believe that you guys can hammer those ascents in the Alps day after day with no illegal help… I was that fool. I bought in to...
3,028
Dear Coach,
Let me start by saying that I am thankful you are giving your time to coach my child’s team. Parents often don’t act very grateful, and so I want to assure you that even when we get testy, we are still glad that you are out there doing the job. Maybe some day I will be doing the coaching, but until then, I’m glad I can just watch!
If you are a parent, then you will understand everything that I am about to say to you. But because you are a coach, I know that it is tough to wear the parent and coach hat at the same time. If you are not a parent, these are things you need to understand as we start the season:
I’m not out to get you; I just love my child. If it seems at times that I have a personal vendetta against you, please know that this is not true. I just love my...
3,023
Dear Sooner Fans,
We need your help!
We started the season with a strong November by playing a tough schedule to challenge our guys. We did a lot of good things, but we also know there are areas where we need to improve. We like this group. They play hard and together. And we are committed to getting better throughout the season.
This is where you come in. We’ve seen some great growth in attendance over the past couple of years for our premier home games. And we’ve seen some growth already this season, particularly with the involvement of OU students. In fact, we’ve made several enhancements to our game day environment. Now we’re asking you to help us take the next step by turning out the largest December basketball crowds OU has seen in years.
We play four home games...
2,660
Dear Parents,
Thank you for enrolling your child in a recreational league. Rec sports are a great way to help kids have fun while staying healthy and active.
The definition of recreation is activity done for enjoyment. The mission of our recreational league is for all of our players to find enjoyment in this sport, no matter their skill or ability level.
While we believe that there’s a place for more competitive youth leagues, we want to be clear. We are not that place. Why? Let’s start with a few facts:
More than one third of children and adolescents are overweight or obese.
Research from the Positive Coaching Alliance shows that 70% of children quit playing sports by the age of 13. Children list the pressure put on them to win as one of the top reasons they quit....
2,691
Dear NFL,
We’re sad to have to write this letter, but some things need to be said. Because our relationship is in serious jeopardy and, well, it’s not us.
It’s you.
You’ve spent a lot of time, and cash, courting us. And you’ve done a truly great job. We women have fallen for you, and hard. We’re now nearly half of your current fan base.
Which is why we feel you deserve this criticism. You invited us to the party. You’ve indicated you think we are important. And yet, let’s consider how you’ve lately chosen to show it.
Still! We’re not ready to give up on you. We want—so much—to be able to continue to spend so much of our free time—our Sundays and our Monday and Thursday nights—with you. But things have got to change. So we have some suggestions for how you might begin to...
2,624
Dear Fabricio Coloccini, players and staff.
I’ve never been backward in going forward when it comes to an opinion and I know that you might not always agree with my views as an ex-player.
But the club and people you are representing are on their knees at the moment.
I don’t know about you but when I used to pull on the black and white shirt and look at the badge I could feel the hairs stand up on the back of my neck, and my heart used to skip a beat.
That was just pulling on the shirt by the way, imagine how I felt when I scored a goal at St James’ Park.
Actually, it still gives me a tingle now thinking about it.
Right now, I have never known the fans to be so low since probably 2009 when they were relegated at Villa Park.
That can’t happen again; but you – the...
3,654
Open letter to Budweiser: Please will you sponsor all South African sport? Wholesale rates available
Dear Budweiser
How are you? We are fine. It's a little colder than we like it, perhaps, and this little soccer tournament we're hosting is messing up the traffic, but we can't really complain.
Okay, enough small talk. Here's the deal: We'll give you a 20% discount on every major sports sponsorship in South Africa, right now, and if you negotiate hard enough we may even go to 30%. The only condition is that you have to maintain this awesome ban on all other forms of alcohol inside our stadiums - the one that is working so well at the World Cup venues right now.
See, we watch a lot of sport here in South Africa. We also drink a lot of beer. Sometimes we drink a lot of beer while watching sport, then we get into our cars to drive home and die along the way. We also start bar fights...
2,980