Lifestyle

When I wrote about E. F. Benson’s very funny but also rather nasty Mapp and Lucia, I speculated that one reason I didn’t love it is that “I like my social comedy served up with a hint of conscience, or even of pathos.” “Give me Nancy Mitford any day,” wrote Min in the comments — and that reminded me that Mitford is another writer I keep meaning to read. So I asked for and got The Pursuit of Love and Love in a Cold Climate for Christmas (thanks, D...
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Dear Porn Industry, I never watch porn. Or rather, before this week, I had never watched porn. I’m not sure why I chose this week to change that habit but my boyfriend was busy, I guess I got a bit curious, and everyone does it, right? I wasn’t looking for anything too “hardcore” or unusual. But in a way, this makes what I found even more shocking – I used a simple Google search and what I found was degrading, disrespectful, and outright damaging. I am not going to disclose how many sexual encounters I have had but I will say that when I was seventeen, I had my first “boyfriend”. We fooled around, as hormone-fuelled teenagers do – nothing too frisky, mind: just hands. And he came. As boys do. And he came over my stomach. And I thought, ‘that makes sense, he doesn’t want to get...
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I’m sorry you didn’t get the chance to be born and carry on the family line. You might have been funny and warm like your potential dad, Bob, or ditzy and slightly neurotic like your potential mum, Sharon, but we’ll never know. You see, I never felt particularly broody. Other women would drool over babies, but although I agreed they were cute I didn’t feel that I must have one. Whenever I held someone else’s baby they always cried, as if sensing they were being cradled by a novice. Now it’s too late. I am entering the perimenopause, you see. My child-bearing years are nearly at an end and Bob and I are too set in our ways now. Even if I decided to try to beat my biological clock and gave birth to you in nine months time, in September 2015, by the time you were 20 I would be 69. I’m...
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Dear Acquaintances, If you find you are listed below, please reconsider your grasping, clasping inclinations. Friend of a friend that I’ve met only once and now encounter at another party One conversation about the weather and an old movie we both saw doesn’t mean we are on a hugging basis. Or that we know each other. Or that I like you. You know what? I lied to you. I don’t like rainy days. They are depressing. And I hated that movie. Julia Robert’s teeth are too big and she reminds me of a horse. And once a horse bit me. No shit. Right on the shoulder. That sucker just stretched his big head right out of the stall and chomped on down. So big teeth are freaky, and I hate all of Julia Robert’s movies. And what I mean by that story is keep your grubby mitts off of me. Coworker...
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So you think that sexually active gay men should not be able to donate blood? Yet, when I went to donate, with a tattoo from almost a year ago, you told me that I would have to wait until it was a full year and then I’d be fine. What? You need to get one thing clear- STRAIGHT PEOPLE CARRY STDs AND STIs AS MUCH AS HOMOSEXUALS! I still can’t believe that the people in charge of regulating food and drugs don’t know this simple fact! If they do, it just makes it seem like you’re trying to play God and kill people by not having a significant supply of blood. Then again, if you were trying to play God, nothing in the past of the FDA would lead me to be surprised. If someone has HIV or AIDS, it’s detectable in the blood sample the take from your finger before you donate. it could be...
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Dear People Who Fear/Reject Feminism, Why are we afraid of being labeled as Feminist if we believe in gender equality? Can we please get past labeling and get to the point. It’s quite simple; you are a Feminist if you believe in the social, political, and economic equality of the sexes. You are also a Feminist if you acknowledge that there is social inequality based on gender, and that this benefits one gender more than the other, but also understand that this inequality causes social, political, and economic implications for both genders. It is important to remind you of what Feminism really is, because studies show that individuals will not identify as Feminists until after they are reminded of the definition. The weight of the term is so heavy that the association of Feminism comes...
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Your Holiness: For the past many weeks now, I've been mulling over whether or not to write this Open Letter simply because I do not know if it will see print and find its way to finally get your attention. Finally, I was able to summon up enough courage to take chance for whatever worth it may have. In a nutshell, my concern is about a registered family-owned lot (in the province of Capiz, Roxas City, Philippines) which is unjustly and illegally occupied by a Chapel of the Archdiocese of Capiz without our knowledge. The illegal construction of the chapel was discovered many years back when I visited the province to sell the property lot. I am 72 years old and the rest of my siblings are in their late 70's and 80's. We are in dire need of finances for our daily...
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So this is the only place I can be honest. So I will be. If you read this and are offended, don't read it again. I never cared that you judged me, you had no right to anyway. But I still want to say my piece. Here goes. I don't know I want to have a child or not, but because I cannot conceive naturally, I am going to go through IVF. Even though I'm not sure I want a child. Why am I going to try IVF? Cos it pisses me off that my body can't do what all women take for granted that they can do. Getting pregnant, must be one of the most natural thing to happen to women. But I cannot experience that due to way my body is. It's no one's fault. It's not my age. My mum had the same issue, so for all I know, I've always been like this. So I can't get pregnant. Regardless if I...
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Dear Hypocrite Society, I am writing this letter to address my concerns. I say a video online recently where a young man was beat and called obscenities when he came out to his family. How could someone do that to their child? Someone you gave birth to and promised to protect? You hit them and call them vulgar names? You are no parent, you are a bully. I am not gay myself but I feel you should love whoever you want. If you want to love someone of the same sex, go ahead. I applaud you. You are braver than most for doing what you want, not what society told you to do. Over the years I have listened to my family talk. They say that gay people are okay. I even hear the “I have a gay friend so I am okay with it.” Are you really okay with it? When the notion of someone in the family...
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Hi Allison. You Have Been Misguided. I read your article and it sucks. In 2050 you may have a “decorated career in advertising” with a “track record of success,” but that won’t matter to you as much as it did in 2014 when envisioning 2050. I want to remind you that 36 years isn’t a lifetime away; in fact, it’s right around the corner. In your article, future-Allison rambles on about working her way up the advertising ranks and churning out work for the biggest clients. I’m here to tell you that in 2050 that will no longer be as precious to you. Your article claims that you want to “make a big splash” or “disrupt the natural order of things.” Stop aspiring for what your future is supposed to be. Future-Allison might have some shining moments, but that’s not all she’s about....
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