How I wished I was stronger that time. That time we had you. I know I really disappointed myself, my parents & Him & you. I've always hated the idea of doing what I did back then, I've lost you, we've lost you. How selfish we've been to deprive you of what you should have, the life you could have lived, the love you should & could have felt. I am so sorry. I was held back by my fears, doubts, insecurities, pressure, I wasn't ready. I was not, really. I was in denial when we found out about you. When in fact, I should have been grateful cause Im blessed with an angel. But you were with a monster. And I am very sorry for that. If only I could turn back that time, I would keep you. I really want to keep you Please know that. But your mom was just someone who doesnt even have a stable job, clear plans, and the guts to raise you back then. I wont be able to give you the life I wanted you to have If you were born that time. I know this sounded as an excuse baby, I couldnt blame you. If only you could see what I was going through then, I was mentally stressed. And I am really thankful for your dad because he's always there. He never left me. Please know that he loves you, still.. you were our first angel :) and you'll always be. You became our foundation, our greatest foundation. We've promised to never leave and continue to love each other because that love was the reason we had you. Please forgive our selfishness, please forgive us for what we've done. And please, help me to forgive myself :( please baby..
