Here's to all the birthdays that I celebrated, all the trouble I created, and all of the nasty nights I went through. Cheers to me. Cheers to you. Cheers to all the things you told me, that wound up untrue. The sleepless nights I fought the tears away while lying in bed going through the toughest heartbreak, the toughest battles, the toughest wounds, and the toughest ride. Although you were nowhere to be found, I followed in your footsteps. I ran away from all of those problems, and became a problem of my own. Because of you, I ran far from them. I took after you. I learned that dealing with problems isn't necessary, and dealing with you was close to the impossible. As time moved forward, I was states away. I constantly wondered if you ever thought of me. As a big problem arose, you came to my rescue, and I finally felt relieved. That was until I realized, I had not escaped any problems. Because, my real problem had been you. I met a boy. And, he's done me grand. You adored him, until you realized he wasn't a problem and I wasn't running away. Until you realized that I was for once happy. It's been three years since I've been happy, and you weren't even the least bit of happy for me. So, once again you ran from your problems, you kicked your "problem" right out of the door. Leaving a note telling your problem it was time to leave. So, I did. I packed my things and I left. I didn't leave with bad intentions though. I left with strong willpower. I was determined to show you what I was made of. I gave up school, and got some secondary education. But, who's to say that was a bad decision? You? "Family"? Your friends? That decision was the best decision I've ever made. But, not for you. For myself. Half a year had passed without you, so I decided it was time to get real. I moved on and got my own place with a wonderful roommate who grew into family. You saw it once, maybe twice. But, you barely even said 3 words. We finally grew closer, and I couldn't wait to tell you the news. I got a job, but it was a few hours away. I didn't want to make you mad. I just wanted you to be proud of me. Even though you weren't and you had cut off your problem again, I moved anyways. I took that job, and I got my own apartment. By myself, my biggest fear was coming true. It wasn't fun moving into a new place so far from my hometown. But, I knew it was right. I've always known what was best for me. You've done nothing but drag me down. I'll admit it was hard to be so excited for myself because my own mother wasn't excited for me. I've lived here for almost a year, and you still haven't seen my place. I invited you, but you bailed. I understand though, some of us just can't face our problems, because we're too ashamed of them. Or perhaps we're too ashamed to face them head on and find a solution. How am I supposed to get excited when I get engaged? How am I supposed to get excited when it's my wedding day? How will I get excited when I find out I'm pregnant? What about my very first real job after college? Or even my college graduation? How am I supposed to get excited for all of these future things if you aren't there to enjoy it with me? All because you can't face me without destroying me? You don't destroy problems, you overcome them, you build up with your problems. You take those problems, and you grow to make it a success. I no longer question anything you do. Everything you've ever done has only hurt. Why should I allow myself to get hurt by you? Only I can hurt myself. I don't want to be rude, I want to be honest. At one time, you were my best friend. At one time, you were my hero. At one time you were my mother. But, now. Now your just somebody that I used to know. So, Kudos to you on being my real MVP and showing me that there are haters in this world, and sometimes they happen to be the ones closest to you. I no longer need you to be excited for me. I don't need you to be proud of me. Because, I'm very proud of myself. And to me, that's all that matters.
