“All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing.” (Edmund Burke)
When I was second year at the university I got pregnant. I was confused because I took precautions, it was not meant to happen. My boyfriend begged me so much to keep it, he promised me the world and proposed to marry. I was shocked but at the end decided to give it a chance. I believed him. It was a mistake. We got married and the kid was born. I realized I have no idea what to do and that it really is a hard job. Long story short - I couldn't make it handling two things - nor the time, nor the money to finish my education. I had to work a low paid job and nothing looked promising in my future. Me and my husband, we started arguing a lot. He was sure he owns me and showed his true colors - an abusive, lazy, extremely jealous jerk and a control freak. At last, in his anger, he finally admitted he did impregnated me on purpose, because he was afraid I will surpass him too much and leave him. I divorced anyway, but my education was ruined. I witnessed the same story with some of my friends marriages – the husbands showed their true face after signing and giving birth. One of my friends was even impregnated on purpose second time because the jerk saw her slipping in divorce, so my friend had no choice but abortion and she described the feeling, as one of the worst she ever had.
What can be said about that? Usually it's the opposite, men are afraid to be surprised with a baby and be forced child support, losing their freedom. In reality men can also use same strategy to keep a woman, abusing her motherly instincts and playing with her feelings.
I believe the abortion ban is nothing but hypocrisy. If it really was about the heartbeat, if it was pro-life, if it truly was about the sake of the child, then men in power, the ones who make this decisions will want the best for this new life, right? If they really cared so much they will assure the kid has the greatest chance. But they don't do that. Why? Because it never was about giving life a chance, it truly is about controlling women. Politicians doesn't care what happens with those children after being born. They lower the budget of already existing orphanages and show no remorse neglecting those already existing and full facilities.
Since patriarchy held its roots women are seen as possession. Women are something supposed to be stolen, bought, earned as a trophy. "Slay the dragon, obtain the princess" mindset. Women are seen as rewards, not as independent persons. Also keeping in mind, that men are encouraged to seek sex at any cost and are accepted as manly enough only if they get as more as possible. Meanwhile women are valued for the opposite, to avoid sexual encounters. In result aggressors are searching for a way to take control on women's bodies and not care about their desires. Who cares what a trophy wants? A trophy is a thing, not a person.
Entitled men still don't bother to take precautions of getting their girlfriends pregnant. They still refuse to sacrifice a tiny chance to feel less pleasure and wear a condom or at least pull out. Because it is a man's world and they walk bald and carefree, their satisfaction is sacred, let women pay for life for their 30 seconds of pleasure. It's still easier for a man to walk free if decides he have enough of family life and raising children, he is free to leave as he please and start a new family, impregnate another woman if he wants to. Such men shall be held accountable for their carefree lifestyle. Two are needed to cause a pregnancy.
If it really was for the sake of pro-life, rape and incest will be severely punished especially if it ends with impregnating a minor. Men in power see no problem with forcing a child to bare a child, but they don't see the need to seek responsibility from criminals. They are still not held responsible for rape and incest. If you ask women, we prefer dying or be insanely battered than being raped. I know, because I prefer that, me and all the women I ever spoke with. Because rape makes you feel so powerless, so humiliated, so stripped from dignity, from self-value, and so dehumanized for the rest of your life. Rape takes all the light a human soul has, it takes away all rights and will to live. It makes you feel not a sentient being, it makes you feel not human, but "a tool, a thing". After so many decades of rape, women finally demand this offense to stop, to be taken seriously, because it is. I am one example: on my personal list of horror as biggest offense №1 is "murder", №2 is "rape", №3 is "being caused great bodily injury". As stated - "rape" is pretty close to "murder", so close, it's equally horrifying, when it happens, we are afraid for our lives. But criminals most likely won't even face consequences for causing this terror, rapists still get none or extremely low sentences. Rape is still not seen as a big deal, there is no understanding of the massive devastation, the nightmares and anxiety women have to face for the rest of their lives. That severe crime takes same penalty as petty theft. Yes, ladies, our horrific experience is seen as misdemeanor, as shoplifting, assaulting our bodies counts as stealing a pack of gum. Offenders will face something like probation, few days community service, a slap on the wrist. That's why women still are afraid and see no reason, no consequences if report. Women are still the ones who took the blame, we still bear the devastation all alone. Rape and rape culture are still neglected as "not a big deal", "women overreacting", "women exaggerating a minor offense". Nowadays when women finally have the opportunity to make a statement, when #MeToo was born, when women's voices are getting loud, when we demand to stop rape culture. This culture which is so convenient for monsters, they are used with it, they see nothing wrong with it, they diminish it, they normalized it.
Meanwhile we can face 99 years in prison if illegally terminate a pregnancy. Really? Even mass murder doesn't get that much. What about those who cause the impregnation – If women can face a huge time in prison for ending a pregnancy, then irresponsible nasty men shall serve same sentence for failing to support their girlfriends and pushing them into the path of desolation, pushing them to commit illegal abortion. They also deserve jail time for failing to support the women they claim to love, who they carelessly impregnated for the sake of not losing a tiny bit of pleasure. Two are needed to cause a pregnancy. But the burden is as always carried by the women alone. We alone pay the price of jerk's constant demand and unleashed desire to be sexually pleased. Besides, it is not an uncontrollable wish, those men simply are too entitled of their needs and what they deserve. No one deserves in any way unlimited access and control to another person's body. It was never pro-life, it's a heartbeat nonsense.
Besides how can someone who knows nothing about women anatomy, biology and sensations, how can he make decisions about something absolutely no familiar to him. Take for example Trump's view on abortion procedure – it is like a fairy tale and is not even close to reality. It makes me wonder if basic biology takes place in the curriculum. His description is a complete nonsense.
If it really was about morality instead of ban on abortion, sexualization of children and objectification of women shall be forbidden. All those beauty contest for minors, pregnant teens reality shows, kids oriented movies and productions, where children dress and behave like adults, all this should be banned. Instead, women are stripped from the right to decide their own and their families future.
I see this rape culture mindset as the reason to forbid abortion. It never was pro-life, monsters are simply trying again to take over women's bodies. To claim us as their possessions, as tools to be used the way they decide. To silence us, to keep us busy in non-valued daily routines which stops us from evolving. To keep us "in the kitchen", obedient and dependent.
It truly is for putting women "on their place". The place abusers chose for us - servants, housekeepers, mothers. They want us silenced and obedient, too busy with no paid housework, caring for kids and elders, too busy for education and career. At best - stuck in an aimless low paid job, so we can be dependent and rely on their decisions about everything, including what to do with our own bodies. It was never pro-life. It was always about prevail, control and enslave. It is a never ending war on women. Those men, who feel threaten by women and doesn't want or understand equality, they want to rule - to compete, to never share. As always. That's the path of self-destruct.
They still don't see us as equals, they refuse to accept us to walk tall, side by side, as equal partners.