The unheard screams of a mother and child.
After getting myself into a rut of about a month along with illness and obviously covid19 it's been a emotional rollercoaster. The house a mess, rent arrears all of which are admittedly my own doing but I had my beautiful little boy aged 6 and 4 months and my 17 year old hormonal middle son and we were happy together. At aged 4 I had decided to home school my youngest as he was a little speech delayed and still not fully potty trained (he would wee bit would not poo out of a nappy). Did some online research and it's not uncommon for speech delay or for boys to have potty training issues up until around 5 so I wasn't worried as my other 2 grown boys hit their milestones at different times as all children do. Then came covid19 and the lockdowns and to be honest we as a family really loved being together and I suppose I've just got swept along and become covid comfortable. My baby boy is still speech delayed but is toilet trained but wears pull-ups at bedtime as he does still have accidents overnight sometimes. Admittedly a little overweight but he eats real food not fast foods and he doesn't even like chips. When at home he doesn't like to wear clothes and no matter how often I try he prefers to be my nature boy and nakedly free. He has a full wardrobe of clothes 4 pairs of shoes, 2 coats and of course wears clothes when we go out to the park or beach of to our friends and family or shopping etc he just strips them off himself when we get home. He is boisterous, funny, beautiful and truly a good boy and mother and child bond is extremely strong, we have never had a day apart from each other and I truly adore him. He can read a little, knows his left from right can count, spell and knows his Abc's but he does like to cheat playing snap. Anyway so nearly a week ago the police were here for my partner (work environment issue) the following day 2 other officers and 2 social workers were at my door with concerns about Nathan, I unhappily let them in and I agreed to sort the kids bedroom out and put the CLEAN washing (it was a mess) away. The police left and spent a while with the social workers who agreed to come back on the 29th December to meet dad and middle son and see how we had progressed. This is not what happened. The next day 2 new social workers came with police and advised the original social worker had gone back to the office and spoken to her manager and changed her mind. They took my baby into emergency care. Was given a full medical where he had NO signs of any physical abuse (have never smacked any of my children) weight was a little concern and speech/social delay etc. My home has been transformed back to its former self and is all as it should be. They are taking me to court for an ICO tomorrow for around 22 weeks. I've begged them to let him home contact is supervised and he spends the entire time begging to come home. He's not eating very much and they are worried about him. He's wearing nappy pants all day and night so completely regressed and if you saw this little boy it's heartbreaking the sadness in his eyes is literally killing me. I've told them I'd let them have 24/7 open door policy and I'd do everything they wanted without question just to let him home to his family. I am no risk of harm to him and they even said I was "killing him with kindness". Love is what is called. Guilty of having a rough patch... absolutely also guilty of hiding behind covid19 a little too but I adore that boy and he adores me too. I am being punished for the children who are abused and beaten and murdered. I am many things and I'm not perfect but I am his perfect mummy and he is my perfect boy. No one is listening to me or seeing how miserable he is. This is intolerable cruelty and surely more damaging to him. He thinks I've abandoned him when in fact he is safer at home than anywhere else in the world. With lockdown looming again I will have no physical contact with a lost little boy who just needs to come home. I'm screaming at the top of every mountain and somehow my voice isn't being heard. Tomorrow is court hearing and they will get the ICO as the law protects children and I 100% agree with that. We are not facts on paper we a multicoloured rainbow and my boy is every beautiful colour, but right now he's grey. No Christmas for us this year. What happens to us! They have broken us and this is just paperwork to them. A mother who loves her child, a family without a little brother. Won't anyone stop this insanity. Please before it's too late!
