You constantly pester me asking ‘’ When are you getting married?’’ What I want to shot back with is ‘’ Excuse me, why do you even think it’s your business???’’. But I can’t say that. If I do, the image I’ve depicted in everybody’s mind is going to get tarnished. That nice, soft spoken, kind girl who wears her big smile 24/7, can’t be snappy at anybody even in the times she’s faking it! So I have to be nice and give you response that you’ll accept. How unfair life is? If I’m not nosy about your personal affairs, why can’t you leave me alone?
Let me tell you, why am I not married yet. It’s because I haven’t met ( or met but for some reason we had to be aprt) that person, whom I want to spend the rest of my life with, whom I want to grow older with, who I can’t live without. You ask ‘’how come? Girl, you’re so beautiful, bubbly, kind, well nurtured and successful. It’s a waste of life to be single?’’. Well, we shall agree to disagree here. Nothing is too good. When I go out men hardly think I’m single so they hardly approach me. When I approach men, they think I’m too bubbly or too full of energy so ‘’she cannot be single’’, so they don’t make an effort. Well, I don’t blame them. I can’t help how I see by others. It’s beyond me.
Do you think I don’t want to be loved? You got me wrong. All my life I’ve been that girl who wanted to be loved, deeply loved and cared by someone special. Whom would treat me like he doesn’t want to let me go, or pull away from me because of the situation is difficult or whatever, who would be with me every thick & thin of life! I am not looking for a fairy-tale ending, but a realistic relationship.
Have I ever tried? You have no idea!!! I’ve been in relationships that drained my energy but I was hoping that would turn around for better (and never did!), relationships that tried to make me compromise of my own personal growth (which I couldn’t wait to get out of!), Relationships that tried to control me in every thought I have had about anything (which made me vowed to myself, I’ll be forever single than spending my life with them!!), relationships that gave me so much to learn about life and to take a leap ( which I still cherish), relationships that ended even without any explanation ( which I wondered I was not worth of even an explanation and made me self-pity!), A relationship that came with an expiry date attached but I didn’t realise I’ve deeply fallen for him until he moved to his new destination (which situation made me lose him but I never would be able to fall out of love with!!).
All these relationships started with best of intentions but the fact is 99% of relationships fail! I can’t do anything about it. The only thing I can do, when you ask me ‘’when you’re getting married?’’ is to just smile and say ‘’soon’’! Because, despite being failed in relationship thus far, I learned one thing. There is always a hope, that keeps me going and force me to believe ‘’ there’s something better is coming for you in your way’’. So, next time when you urge to ask me that same question, let me tell you, marriage doesn’t define you, neither the relationship you’re in! We shouldn’t do things because of the pressure of the society. So if you still try to pester me, my standard answer is going to be‘’ its none of your business, back off!’’
- From all the women out there who doesn’t want you to pester them anymore!
Open letter to whom asks me when are you getting married?