Open letter to Sarah and Cam Newton

Subject: Open letter to Sarah and Cam Newton
From: Everyone
Date: 19 Jan 2016

Below is a simple to use format to write to opposing teams after your team gets beat. Can be used in any sport in any city. Feel free to use and ad lib as you feel necessary. This can apply to any US City.

Dear {Opposing Team Players Name},
I am a {team that lost} fan, I bleed {their team colors}. Although I will be the first to tell you that on {day after loss}, we {BS excuse for losing}, so {you got lucky otherwise we would have won statement}. My {social media addiction site} keeps showing you, but not in a good way. It is a video of you {doing something to a meaningless team “icon”}. You see the one thing that people don’t realize is, {insert any team name} fans aren’t just fans. The {team icon} symbolizes {blah blah family community charity like thing that every other city and organization in America does}. So you see {Opposing Team Players Name}, disrespecting the {icon} isn’t just disrespecting our team, it is disrespecting the fans that back our team. {Insert very long tribute about how “unique” of a city it is making sure to mention children to really drive home point}. While you’re practicing, {High Profile Home Team Player} will be at {a team sponsored charity event, again use children for emphasis} because he is awesome! So next time you disrespect our {team icon}, {Opposing Team Players Name}, you are hurting sick children. {Go on to show how you are still a winner even though your team lost and they are special just like EVERYONE ELSE! For really passive aggressiveness use God, love, or children again to pull at heart strings to show how much better you and your fans are}. So Mr. {Opposing Team Players Name}, may you {insert sarcastic hope of changing and maybe God again}.

Signed,
{Passive Aggressive Loser fan that most likely only watches when the team is winning or in high profile games}

PS
Get over yourself Sarah he threw a dumb flag that someone put in his face!

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