An Open Letter To The One I Don't Want To Lose

Subject: An Open Letter To The One I Don't Want To Lose
From: Me
Date: 10 Sep 2016

Dear You,

We both know that neither of us have had the best of luck in the way of "best" friendship.Both of us have gotten left behind, and so we both know how bad that feels. We're told all the time how much a breakup hurts, but I'd wager that being friend-dumped is worse by far. Why? Well, when you get dumped by a girlfriend or a boyfriend, the hole they leave behind is girlfriend/boyfriend shaped.
Eventually, you'll fall in love again and it'll be easier to forget all of the reasons you were hurting so badly before. You'll find "the one", and then you'll understand why it never worked out before.

When a friend, a best friend, dumps you, the space they leave in their wake is almost impossible to fill. Even years and years after the fact, when you haven't spoken to your ex-friend in forever and the last text messages exchanged are gone, when you've deleted the cute, inside joke-inspired emojis from their contact name, and when the only exchanges you make with them are sporadic likes on Instagram selfies, you'll see them on Snapchat, see their face in your oldest photos, and the emptiness they left you with will rear it's horrible head.
The moments you've shared with them become painful to recall, and there's a good chance you'll feel resentment, even anger. "How could they do that to me?" You'll wonder, "After all we'd been through? Didn't I mean more to them than that?"

But that's the thing, and it's taken me quite some time to figure this out. Someone else's incapability to recognize your value does not decrease your worth. I know this might be hard to believe, but trust me- I'm something of an expert on the subject.
At some point or another, everybody goes through it. I've been through it (far too many times), and I know you have, too, but you don't have to worry. I reject the idea that you don't know what you've got until it's gone, because I know exactly what I've got and I won't be letting go of it anytime soon.

You understand who I am, and when others have no idea what's going on inside my head, you know precisely what I'm thinking.
On my worst days, you've sat right by my side and, sometimes without even saying a word, have kept me together when it seemed to me that the world was falling apart. You were there on my best days, too, standing beside me like the queen that you and I both know you are, and we always shine brightest together.
When I needed to be told no, you didn't refrain. When I craved validation, you reminded me that I'm not worthless. You're my person, and I wouldn't last a day from this point on without you. You're the Phil Lester to my Dan Howell, the glorious daytime to my star-studded nights. You're my muse, my therapist, my keeper, and, for the first time in a while, I have no fear of losing you.

You're my best friend, and I will always be yours.

With Love,