Dear Satu,
Finally year 2022 and bold new beginnings, but what changed? Did Satu change? Despite all of your never ending talk about groundbreaking transformation and spiritual growth. No I don’t think that you did. Does my opinion count, I don’t think that it does, it never did to you. You would have already changed something if it did. But let’s be realistic, you don’t change, do you? You asked for examples of your entitled behavior, here are just a few. For me this is just to reflect back, and move on.
I’ve had the odd privilege of having a front row seat in your self-sabotage almost four years now. Your cycle of abusing family, friends, and professional relationships has not changed one bit. Somehow you still manage to keep your head above water. The cost, maybe there is none that makes a difference to you.
The cost – looking from outside in – is the fact that karma is a brutal dance partner. When your professional and personal life is built on lies and abuse, it has a habit of catching up with you. What catches up is the fact that your word, personal or professional, is not to be trusted. I learned this way too late. Delivering on your promises, keeping your word, the blame seems to lie with the person who took your word for more than it’s worth. Live, learn and move on, as they say. Thank you for the lessons learned.
Professional life
How many written warnings from HR does it take, to make you realize they’ve been given for a good reason? Still you changed nothing. Explanations and excuses. Bad day, bad managers, annoying directors, unreasonable customers, and team members who envy you. They must envy you, right.
Unethical behaviour, unkept promises, abusing company trust and resources, placing yourself outside written rules. Need to continue? Three different customers raising cases against you, credit card abuse, and relocating countries against company policy. Those were only a few in your last two roles, how about your behaviour in previous three countries or companies? Different countries, different companies, similar behaviour, and sometimes even the same written warnings.
I bet you can’t even remember all the customer cases, or more precisely the lies that made those customers outraged enough to report you. I made an unacceptable choice when I degraded to your level, and chose to save your job in 2019, when I could have ended it by simply sharing the facts. I made a bad decision based on pity, not based on what was in front of me.
Little lies here and there, because after all, if you can sneak a few personal items in your expense reports, who would be the wiser. Why shouldn’t you double-dip for extras, car allowance and a public transport. The system is flawed if it allows you to abuse it. It doesn’t hurt to try, you so cleverly said when submitting your pharmacy receipts, when it’s the company that is giving you a headache. Personal Uber here and there, and a little spa&massage in the hotel bills. You deserve it, don’t you. Everybody is doing it! Keep telling yourself that, if it helps. You are that essential to the company, they should be happy to pay you extra.
Making short term decisions with customers, it’s not a lie if you thought hard about keeping your word. If you made promises behalf of someone else, it is not your fault if they don’t deliver. You got compensated for your efforts, that will make it all better. Customers disconnecting and wanting to pull their name off of your reference list or your “success” stories, really sad and disturbing, but you already got your short term win. You know what? There has always been someone to clean up the messes you made. It’s like physical garbage, walking away, won’t make it magically disappear. You got outraged when you were unwelcome and called a poor team player, by the business owner, but to be fair you made him clean up your messes twice.
If you look at the professional reputation you now have. When do you think you become unhirable? New company or a new country, when things get too hot to handle. You jumped ship last minute this time, what about the next.
Personal life
What about family and friends. From where you sit, those that have supported you are idiots after all. They must be. They all have an agenda to get you, to hurt you, to benefit off of you. Friends especially of the same age, men and women are falling over themselves to have a romantic relationship with you. When friends deny it, or if they give you a harsh reality check, it just confirms what you already knew. Trying to hurt you all along, you were so right. Have you ever stopped to think that the only piece in this never-ending hurt puzzle, that is a constant, is you. Four years and at least five ended friendships.
Paying or working for your share. In life, and in general. Why would you do that? If you can let someone else pay, or you can let someone else do your heavy lifting. Why don’t you try the truth for a change, I don’t want to deliver on my word. I don’t want to pay. I don’t want to be bothered. I don’t want to change. You leave when you should put in effort, any kind of effort.
“parasitism, close relationship between two in which one benefits at the expense of the other, sometimes without killing the host organism.”
Rule of thumb for the future, it takes money and/or hard work to belong to a group of equals. It takes money or work to earn a seat, voice, and a vote at almost any table in this life. You have none, no seat, no voice, and no vote. It was a choice you made, no one else.
Family and legacy
How about family. You deserve an inheritance, why are they not giving you your fair share. Grandparents and parents. Paid like you should be paid, you are the oldest after all. You deserve an inheritance. Have you ever considered that you just might not? Have you ever considered that they see you. The real you. They know what would be left of that legacy after a year or two.
People around you seeking professional therapy, what a bunch of idiots. Paying big pharma, for what. If they would just pay for the energy healing, they would be all better. If they paid you, they would be all better. Better, like you are now better. Happier, like you are now happier. Levelled up – to where – to broke and leading a life that serves only one person, you.
Those people that have shared your journey, all frustrate and eventually leave because there is a limit anyone can tolerate abuse, emotional and/or financial. Please continue paying your light healer for long distance energy transfers and sessions. Those at least affect your finances, that means they must be working wonders. You can say you are doing all that you can, after all you are spending money you haven’t even earned yet, on you. When in doubt please do check your horoscope for guidance, or the lunar calendar for the best course of action. That has worked well in the past.
Future
I hope you find the rich partner who has that good career, you’ve been looking for all these years. Someone to take pictures of you, for your social media accounts. You deserve to be treated well, all you need is a good provider who understands your unique value. Partner to give you your special day. Have you ever stopped wondering why that Mr Wonderful hasn’t arrived yet. Could it be that everybody is looking for a person who treats them with dignity and love? Not as a wallet on two legs, who pays for your unhinged whims to express yourself.
Like you say it best: Believe when people show you who they really are. You’ve done an excellent job living your truth openly. Looking at the past four years, only one thing comes to mind, who needs enemies anymore, when they have friends like you. Enjoy 2022, it will continue being very honest.
With Love
1st of January 2022 06:35 AM
