You walked into my life at a time where I was still picking up the pieces of my broken heart. I was hurting, broken and lost. I was convinced that after my 17 year marriage ended that I would never love again. I vowed to protect my heart, and I would never let anyone hurt me and make me feel the was I feeling at that moment. But, there you were, you walked in and quickly swept me off my feet. I felt the butterflies in my stomach the moment we met. I tried so hard to play it cool, to keep my walls up and to not let you in. Slowly but surely you broke those walls down, you made me believe in love and I even began to trust again. Our relationship did not end in some big dramatic fashion or some major events like my marriage, and it certainly did not come as a complete surprise. It was the small things at first, the comments, the disregard for my time, the lack of empathy. When things finally ended I was in shock, not at the fact that my first post-divorce relationship ended, but at how much it hurt. I did not expect the pain, the heartache and even the anger that I felt when a 6 month relationship ended. It hurt, it hurt bad. I found myself in tears, lost confused and trying to wrap my head around where I had gone wrong. How did I get myself in this situation again? How could I let you in and let you hurt me again? It wasn't an act or an event that was causing the pain, it was the fact that you knew how bad I had been hurt by my ex, and yet you did the same thing. You broke promises, you stopped making me a priority, and you stopped letting me know you would be there no matter what. The worst part was that you also hurt my kids. They had grown to love you just as much as I had. They saw how happy you made me, and they wanted me to have my happily ever after with you. I know deep down you didn't set out to hurt me, but please know that you did hurt me. Just as quickly as you made me believe in love again you also made build those walls back up, even higher than before.
