Dear Cassidy,
I understand and I'm concerned as your trans elder that you're upset about the Hateraid that has come your way from the transphobically ignorant since your history making homecoming queen win Friday night.
I'm also concerned that you're feeling you can't live up to the pressure of being a role model for our community.
You don't have to. All that you are responsible for right now is focusing on getting your education, enjoying your senior year of high school and being the best Cassidy you can be because that puts you in the best possible position to live up to the amazing potential we trans elders see for your life.
And to quote Eleanor Roosevelt, no one can make you feel inferior without your consent.
So bump the haters. They're mad because you not only won, but you had the courage to do something that far too many of them are too petrified to do in terms of look in the mirror, realize things weren't working, and make the corrections necessary to take control of your life.
You aren't alone Cassidy. You have a worldwide family of trans brothers and sisters who love you and want nothing but the best for you along with the allies of the trans community. There are trans folks in the Los Angeles metro area and elsewhere around the world ready, willing and eagerly waiting to reach out to you, envelop you in an oasis of love and help give you advice about your transition. All you have to do to receive that love, wisdom and hard won knowledge from us is say the word.
Cassidy, you're not only a beautiful young woman inside and out, your win inspired transkids of your generation. It also put a smile on my face and the faces of the trans people of my generation and inspired us to work even harder to ensure the laws are in place to expand trans human rights coverage for all of us.
Your trans elders know going through puberty is hard. We also know that going through puberty in a body that doesn't match who you are inside ain't easy either. Going through puberty as a trans female is an even more daunting task and you will have good and bad days as you do so.
The point is to not to let the haters get you down as you evolve and learn who Cassidy is and what type of woman you wish to project to the world. You must also remember that for every nasty and hateful comment you get, there are ten people who wish nothing but success for you.
If you really want to get back at the haters, them seeing you standing tall, looking good and proudly walking the halls of Marina High and everywhere you go as if you own the place is the best way you can flip the script on them and own your feminine power.
Success in everything you do from this day forward is also your best revenge. You have already demonstrated the capacity to do that by making your desire to become your school's homecoming queen a reality that was trumpeted by news media around the world.
So take your own advice. Be true to yourself. Dry those tears, stand tall, hold your head up high like the queen you are even before you won the sash and crown to prove it, and confidently tackle the challenges that come your way as the young woman of trans experience you are one day at a time.
I know you can do it, and I have every confidence that you will
Sincerely yours with love,
Monica Roberts
The TransGriot
