Dear AHA,
I hope you don't mind me addressing you as AHA. I know we don't know each other on personal terms to go that far, but at this point I must admit that I have no idea whether you're an Ayaan, a Hirsi or an Ali. My guess is you're a little of everything since you can't make up your mind. And besides, where I live now, the integration process has taught me that it's quite alright to address people with their abbreviated names if you like. And speaking of integration, I think the proper way to do it is not to "act it" but to actually live it and feel it.
As a woman who rejects manmade religion surrounding Islam, I take a firm stand against how you go about your business, and it is your business not mine, no doubt about that. It is one thing to fight for one's rights, it is yet another to fight on behalf of a group of people without council and claim to speak on their behalf. As a Muslim woman, I have fought my own share of battles to come this far in life, and just like you, I did it my way. The only difference between your way and mine is that I don't go around insulting people forcing my way down their throats. It is my belief that action speaks louder than words, leading by example will produce the best results.
To distance yourself from Islam and declare yourself an Atheist is fine and OK by me, it is your personal business, but you can't expect those of us who do believe that there is a right way and wrong way to practice Islam simply swallow that which you preach and follow suit. That's the roll set aside for Islamofascists, remember?
It seems to me that you're on a mission with a personal vendetta trying to score even, because of what's been done to you personally. Hey, believe me, I probably would too if I were minus a clit. But then again the smart bomb approach has never worked for me, it always comes to bite you in the ass. I'm just explaining things from my own personal point of view, trying to reach out to you purely out of compassion, just so you don't feel alone. I too resisted arrest when my mother tried to give me away in marriage to a man who was twice my age and who I hardly knew. I was beat up senseless by my brother for not complying with mother's law. It was my father who ultimately came to my rescue. Lucky me, he remembered how he too was forced by his father into marrying his first wife. He said "Not over my dead body!" "As long as Live I promise you that you may only marry the one your heart desires." He held me in his arms and we cried together for a while. Yes, there are two sides to this spectrum, it's not all about women's rights but men's as well.
The manmade religion I referred to earlier is better known as culture. It is this culture that holds the Muslim world hostage. It is this culture that needs revision and overall reform, for it oppresses the Muslim man as well as the woman. Again I must speak from my own experience. Ironically my brother, the one who beat me senseless at mother's orders, fell madly in love with a non-Muslim girl later on. My mother again felt compelled to intervene and forced him to marry a distant cousin, who she recognized as the perfect submissive mate. Never mind the fact that my brother already fathered a child in secret with his beautiful intelligent non-Muslim girlfriend. Amazingly enough his marriage turned out to be a success, which I personally attribute solely to a union between two submissive individuals. No doubt, my darling brother who constantly followed mother's orders, regardless what his heart told him, is indeed relentlessly submissive.
As a Muslim woman, I want you to be aware that there are tyrants amongst Muslim women as well. And how about the fact that most Muslim women don't even know they're oppressed? I just want you to be cautious, so you don't make the same mistakes. Do as I say and don't do as I do is exactly what we want to avoid.
I too escaped an honor killing by a hair. Another one of my brothers attempted to slit my throat, because Islamofascists in Amsterdam's coffee shops filled his head with nonsense when I became too westernized. Never mind that sibling rivalry was the true core of the matter. My brother wished his whole life that I didn't exist, simply because I excelled at everything where he had failed and he was teased and tormented incessantly by family members, all because his little sister beat him in matters of academics as well as in sports, just to name a few. If it wasn't for my older brother who came to my rescue I would have been dead by now.
So you see in just two examples I mentioned, I was rescued by valiant Muslim MEN not women. This to me is an indication that it is ultimately up to the enlightened Muslim man to set us free and all we have to do is continue to indicate our discomfort and continue fighting our personal battles on our personal front in order to clear the way for generations that follow. I am most certain that my experiences are not uncommon within the Muslim world, anywhere on this planet. I don't claim to have all the answers. I've made many mistakes and I'll probably continue to do so, but hopefully I will continue learn from those mistakes and continue to grow as a person.
I think it's extremely important to look at the issues from all aspects not just from the your views or a woman's point of view.
So my dear AHA, please forgive me if I discard your points view at this time right along with the Steinems and the likes. It seems to me you're quite a novice to the radical side of feminism. Even some of the hard-core feminists by now, as old age is setting in, have expressed regrets on some of the things they did or did not do. I encourage you to learn from their mistakes as well as yours and for goodness sakes do the right thing.
AHA, I must admit that I envy you for one thing: The fact that you hold a leadership position where you could accomplish a great many things which would benefit society as a whole, rather than destroy it. So, my dear AHA, I wish you good luck with Submission II. It's probably too late for me to reach you while it's in the making, but deep in my heart I hope you come to see the light in Submission III, where hopefully you can include all aspects of oppression, because after all we are all part of the problem as well as the solution, men and women alike.
Regards,
Myrtus
