An Open Letter to K-Pop

Subject: An Open Letter to K-Pop
From: Stamos
Date: 27 Mar 2015

Dear K-pop,

Um, let’s talk about how awesome K-Pop is. I mean, first of all, thank you Psy for bringing K-pop to America. You are awesome and I have no idea what you are saying on Gangham Style but I love your tuxedo and your dance moves and your horses and I’m so on board whatever it is you’re selling me. Which, at this point in time, feels like an obsession with K-Pop. I’m sold.

Sure I’ve had the newest Mumford & Sons album on loop since I bought it and I await Taylor Swift’s new singles each Tuesday like it’s Christmas and the Fourth of July and Halloween all at once (my favorite holidays combined = Taylor Swift’s latest ditty on teen angst). But I find that most of my current musical curiosity tuns to K-Pop, and researching K-Pop, and reading interesting articles about K-Pop, and thinking about how I can get into K-Pop, and exploring the amazing nail art of the amazing female stars that comprise a lot of K-Pop, and seriously where can I learn all those sick dance moves?

I want to live inside a K-Pop music video. Seriously. Every K-Pop video I have ever seen (which is so far, around seven) is so much fun. Like a madhouse where everyone is all strung-out on pixie sticks and bubblegum and there are mist machines and techno lights and explosions and also yoga and like, an animated sequence. Everyone has super awesome fun dance moves that are performed in the style of the Step Up movies, as though the dancers are competing against some other group of people dancing, (possibly the viewer?), and everyone has bright colored eyes and hair and glowing skin and wildly inventive but still fashionable outfits and holy hotdog the nail art! I mean this is just some next level nail art. I think Katy Perry could be the closest thing we have to K-Pop. Katy Perry just scratches the surface of K-Pop.

The biggest struggle I’m having with K-Pop is that I don’t know what anyone is saying but I find that I don’t even care all that much because it’s obviously all about fun. I mean this is the most fun-loving subculture I’ve seen since San Francisco’s Summer of Love in 1967, which I obviously wasn’t around for, but have imagined to be dreamy and centered around fun-loving activities.

K-Pop is polished and succinct and is adored by, like, a gazillion people all over the world. We’re all enjoying this moment together! And I am so excited that we are getting into K-Pop here in the US of A because we were super behind on the Electronic Dance Music (EDM, duh) scene and that bums me out because we’re listening to jams that club kids were blasting in Ibiza circa 2002 and it makes me feel a little bit sad for us. It’s weird how 2002 is ten years ago. What was going on in K-Pop then? Sometimes I get super bummed about how all these amazing things are happening musically all over the world but we only get some of it. I want all the music, all the time. I’m proud of us that we’ve gotten on board Psy’s train because I think he’s really onto something with those beats and the moves and that tuxedo and those horses. Mostly the horses. I want to know more about them. I hope horses are a staple in K-Pop music videos going forward.

Love,

Stamos

Category: