The Truth

Subject: The Truth
From: #25
Date: 4 Dec 2017

"No Legacy is as rich as honesty."


It's time you know the truth about us. It's time I stop making you wonder what the hell happened and just lay it out on the line for you. Even if it means a permanent Goodbye.

If you want names of the people who contributed, that's not happening. They have nothing to do with it, these are my mistakes.

Let's begin at the tail end of Senior year;

I swear, I thought you were molded specifically for me. It didn't matter where we were, what we were doing, as long as I was with you it didn't matter. Yes, I was a pain in the ass. I was overdramatic, pessimistic and an absolute idiot at times. But you somehow put up with every little thing I did without any complaints (kinda). I would talk to my friends about you for hours. All our future ambitions and how college and distance would be nothing. I was looking at promise rings for months, flights that would match my schedule. I was doing absolutely everything to make sure what we had would work. Don't ever question that aspect of myself.
But I won't lie, my friends were beginning to get in my head. All this talk about college; fresh start at in college, new girls, no strings attaching me when I go out. The thought of being single began to fill my mind for the first time the day before I graduated. And it ate me alive.
Life is about choices. Each choice takes you down a different road and shapes your future. There are studies that state there may be a parallel universe with the other option of choices we chose in this one and I wished I lived in that one now. Someone asked me before I was leaving to San Francisco if I would regret losing college memories or losing you. I chose that I would regret losing memories in college with my friends and the one night stands more than I would regret losing you. That lead me to the decision of breaking up with you the first time.
Gunshot wounds, losing a championship game couldn't compare to the pain of seeing you cry that day. The hardest thing in the world is seeing the pain you caused in someone's eyes and having to deal with yourself. Maybe that's why I'm writing this instead of saying it in person.
But there's more to it. After we broke up, I went to hang out with someone to shop before I left to San Francisco. She knew we were going to break up, you take your guess on who you think it is. She was simply comforting me, we were talking and things ended up escalating. I can't begin to explain how much of mistaken it was. I tried acting like everything was fine and jump into be


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