An Open Letter To Vanilla Sex

Subject: An Open Letter To Vanilla Sex
From: Suki
Date: 10 Dec 2012

With Fifty Shades of Grey changing the way women view their sexualities, has this book been the reason we’ve opened our eyes to experimentation?

Vanilla sex.

Whether dominating, or dominated, its opened many eyes to BDSM.

Vanilla is the middle ground. It’s not very exciting though, it’s a safe option, a simple flavour. In reference to sex, it’s nothing too ‘saucy’. On a scale of vanilla to Christian Grey, many relationships have a little bit more spark than the everyday flavour. A blueberry taste perhaps? But has this book, described as ‘Mummy porn’, been the reason men are feeling inadequate, whilst the women remain sexual professionals that they need to please? The men are judged on their performance, their stamina and skill. Their variety even. Women don’t want to be bored in the bedroom.

Enter Christian Grey. Fifty Shades has made women want more from their sex lives, boosting Ann Summers’ sales by a considerable amount as we introduce a variety of sex toys into our bedrooms. But what I start to wonder is, are we taking vanilla sex for granted? Is it beginning to appear boring and so-last-summer?


It plays a part of course, and has done for years. People argue until they are blue in the face that porn is bad for relationships, that men in particular get a false representation of women. After all, we aren’t all hairless, with boobs the size of watermelons and the ability to orgasm for hours. Whilst keeping our hair looking perfect and pleasuring our other half all at the same time. Be reasonable now please.

But if men have been getting a ‘false’ idea of women and their abilities in the bedroom all this time, does this mean that Fifty Shades has been a turning point? It seems as though men are now the ones in doubt. Women are taking charge after reading the novels at every opportunity, eager to find out Mr Grey’s newest and darkest new pleasure. Its been said that men have even encouraged their partners to read them.

Underrated, but the basis for good sex.

Vanilla is underrated. Sex is sex, but “vanilla sex” is what it all turns back to. So it must be doing something right, no jokes please.

All in all, vanilla is one of the finer flavours, the starting point and launch pad for experimentation. So grab a spoon and dig in.