The goal in selecting a friend is to establish who the person is and what their motives in life are. Speaks volumes and saves all parties a lot of time. In my mind, the most important thing is Love and Loyalty. In that order. Arguably, you can remove Loyalty from the equation entirely because Love covers that AND Ambition. "Find what you love and let it kill you" and all that.
I introduced X originally to the computer game, GWII because it teaches/shows that in a big way. I have all character slots full with maxed out in XP and am armed to the teeth. I played the game alone long before I met him. If a Boss kills me, then anyone in my position would die. Fair game.
Surprisingly, an Ally showed up on their own. A real Ally that was once a stranger - the kind that wanted to be friends in real life with no idea who I was, what I could do for them, or even my gender. You are the person that taught me I could be chosen in the dark based on your actions and words. You showed up because I looked like I needed help. It wasn't an accident, you found me in a ceaseless ocean. An infinity of 0's and 1's. You opened the waypoints like alchemy to open new universes and you protected me always. You changed the way I saw everything.
What we choose to do in life is bring people into the game when their XP is low. Everyone starts a new game with the same XP and can be taken out by a Boss. The goal is cooperation. When they are weak, we are a fucking long-distance Ranger. When they are strong enough, we choose a Healer character to restore them when they are hit. So they can live to fight another day. In the game, this choice literally makes our armor weak and our attacks short-range. If a Boss comes at us, we don't stand a snowball's chance in hell. We must make the conscious choice to do this. I know you did your fair share of fighting.
You made me learn I didn't need to wield a hammer and lighting to set gas on fire. In fact, its the primary way I ever play now is as a healer. When it stops being fun or the team sucks, we can pick up another game and find new players. Usually, some of the existing team wants us to play a different game with them. One where our XP starts at 0. The right people make that fun, too. We learn a lot. Win-Win-Win.
The good news is that when we pick the right team, they know that we are making ourselves a target so that they can be strong. They rally. The best team doesn't even let the big bad get close to us. They know what is at risk. For them, maybe more importantly for us. Trust was built, love even.
The wrong team forgets that we are even helping them. Maybe they didn't even notice. They not only let us die, but they don't even try to revive us. They could have gotten XP for healing us! Maybe they just didn't learn the rules when they started playing. They are playing their own game. Its highly Machiavellian. They don't realize that the next time they want to play, we won't want to play with them anymore. The world we showed them and explored together is theirs forever, but the rest of it they will need to find on their own.
The order one places their priorities says a lot about the person. Choose love...always. I'm still here - you never signed on anymore. I checked. My # never changed, but I lost yours...with my phone.
Pain is just cross-platform fragmentation. Still here, come join VR sometime. Or coffee. You are among Allies.
