To people afraid to be alone,
With another Valentine’s Day well and truly over, it’s time to share that I am okay with being single. No I’m not one of those people who despise the idea of a relationship, but rather I am content with being by myself when it is called for, rather than putting myself in a situation where I am in a relationship with someone for the sake of it.
It is pretty surprising to me just how many people find themselves doing the daily cycle of a relationship just because it becomes a habit, rather than because they love the person and want to be with them. It has happened for as long as I can remember! Back when I was at school I would see couples in my year either always arguing or sitting there with nothing to say to one another…of course they stayed together because the girl was generous enough to be putting out and the guy wasn’t foolish enough to walk away from it.
My point is that far too many people spend time in pointless relationships for the sake of it, especially when they would be better off being by themselves. My previous point doesn’t just go for teenagers but it stays relevant throughout our loves! It isn’t particularly hard to find someone to have sex with but that doesn’t mean we are bound to him or her. You should instead be looking to surpass this and connect on an emotional and mental level, and then you will be more likely to find something that will last.
For many people it seems a lot easier to jump into a new relationship directly after their last one and it is surprising how quickly you can get snapped up. In fact it is easy to just settle for anyone and some people find it a lot harder to being alone. But to those people I offer some advice.
Take a break!
You know how you might cut out dairy or sweets from your diet? Why not give it a go with relationships and sex? Sometimes stepping back can help give you perspective on your previous relationships and just be a welcome break from the stresses of dating.
Have fun!
People who are used to being in a relationship 24/7 find the idea of being single an incredibly depressing and lonesome thing. But really it is an opportunity to do whatever you want, whenever you want without having to explain yourself to someone else. Remember you don’t have to sacrifice your own happiness for anyone else when you are single!
Finally get to know yourself!
Being comfortable with your own company is paramount to not only being happy with yourself but also to a healthy relationship when it does come around. If you can eliminate as much of the clingy and neediness in you then when it comes around to relationship time, you should be a lot more comfortable.
Overall what I’m saying is don’t be ashamed to be single. There isn’t anything wrong with you if you want to be single for a while and ignore anyone who says otherwise. After all it is better to be single than to be in a relationship for the sake of it, you might never regret being single but you’re likely to regret being in a pointless relationship for way too long.
Sincerely,
A happy singleton
