To My Frat Boyfriend,
When I was younger, and I heard about fraternities and sororities, I heard horrible stories. Greek life was just an excuse to buy friends, party and pay your way into being popular. In many college movies the stereotypical shallow and horrible antagonist was always a member of greek life. Even in the news today fraternities are always making headlines for their racist chants or the rape accusations against them.
When you first came to me with the idea that you wanted to join a fraternity I was a little more than hesitant. Did I really want my boyfriend becoming one of those meatheads that I have heard of? Against my gut I encouraged you to do what made you happy, even if it meant for you to join something I was against.
As quickly as you started the bidding process you were already a pledge for your top fraternity pick. I was so happy how you were finally coming into your own with all your new friends and bonding with all the brothers you made since you decided to join. You had all these inside jokes that didn’t involve me and finally started having fun in college that involved more than playing video games in a friend’s room.
After all these positives then came the negatives. The fears I had about Greek life finally came out. When you went to meetings and could not tell me anything that went on due to pledge promises. There were nights where I thought you were studying or sleeping in bed, and you were really running around New York City doing a scavenger hunt the upperclassman sent you on. The worst was when you disappeared for a solid 24 hours. There were countless fights and days of grudges that were due to your involvement in the frat. I never understood why you had to go mixers when all I wanted to do was talk to you.
Yet with all these negatives, I have to admit I feel that you are a better person due to the fraternity. You came into your own and can now hold your own against others and work well with people. The brothers you have made have your back and will be your best friends in college, and I couldn’t be happier for you. The frat has helped you realize that sometimes the group does come before the individual. Before the frat you didn’t seem to care about much other than our relationship and school. Now the frat is another priority. The way you talk about the frat lets me know that you have more interests and have grown since entering college.
Will I say that our relationship is better with the fraternity in the picture? No. Will I say that I think you are a better man because of the fraternity? Yes. No matter what happens down the road you should always remember how your one decision to rush has shaped your life.
Love,
Your Non-Sorority Girlfriend
