Dear mama whose arms are empty,
I know that you wake up every morning hoping the horrible thing that happened was just a bad dream.
I know you still feel your baby move even though it’s been days, weeks or months since your baby filled your belly.
I know that tears and thoughts of your baby keep you awake at night. I know you despise your body for failing you and your baby.
I know you cringe when you hear whining about terrible pregnancies or cranky babies.
I know you cry in the shower so no one will hear you. I know that you just want to hear someone say your baby’s name.
I know that you hate yourself for the jealousy that consumes you when you hear of new healthy babies being born.
I know that you just want to get pregnant again to make this pain go away.
I know you never want to be pregnant again because you just couldn’t survive another loss. I know.
I also know that soon you’ll fall asleep without tears.
I know that you’ll find a special way to honour your baby’s memory.
I know you’ll appreciate the short months you were able to carry your baby.
I know someday you’ll have kind words and a warm hug to help another mama through this pain.
I know you’ll show the people you meet on your journey the compassion you would have given your baby, after all they are someone’s baby too.
I know you’ll laugh again without guilt.
I know your broken heart will grow back together, it won't be the same as before, maybe even a bit crooked, but it will be stronger than ever.
I know that you are a mother, a mother who loves a baby she can't hold.
Love,
A mama that knows.