Dear America,
Hi there! My name is Brian Joyce. I'm a member of the media. Specifically, I'm a talk radio host. And as a member of the media, I owe you an apology.
In case you didn't notice -- and let's face it, the hope was that you wouldn't -- the long-awaited House Intelligence Report on Benghazi was released late Friday afternoon.
After two years of investigations, endless hours of hearings, and at least one concussion, the Republican-led Intelligence Committee has finally admitted what many of us knew all along: that the Obama administration did nothing wrong in Benghazi; that the White House, CIA and State Department did not deliberately mislead the American people on Benghazi; and that the Obama administration did everything it could to respond to Benghazi in a timely and appropriate manner.
Now, like many members of the media, I enjoy entertaining my audience with exciting topics and stimulating conversation. But unlike many members of the media, I will not resort to lies, myths and misinformation to do it. I will not accuse the President of doing things he never did, and I will not become so blinded with delusional, partisan hatred that I will say anything to get you to listen to my show.
And that's why I'd like to apologize to you, the people of the United States of America. It seems like I'm the exception to the norm.
For too long, too many of my colleagues have been spinning lies, myths and misinformation about Benghazi. We fixated on Benghazi. We obsessed with Benghazi. We wouldn't let Benghazi go. And it turns out we were wrong about almost everything concerning Benghazi.
We told you the President was covering up what happened in Benghazi. We told you the President didn't have a "shred of integrity" on Benghazi. We told you the President was providing "cover" for the terrorists who killed four Americans in Benghazi. We told you that the President could have helped the four Americans who were killed in Benghazi, but instead ordered the military to "stand down." Heck, we even told you the President's Secretary of State, Hillary Clinton, faked a concussion just to avoid testifying on Benghazi!
And after two years of trying our best to convince you that all these things were true, it turns out that we, the media, were the ones who were lying.
According to the House Intelligence Committee's report, there were no intelligence failures leading up to the attack; no stand-down order was ever given; intelligence on who carried out the attacks, and why, was muddled at best; and the White House did not deliberately mislead the American people on anything.
So the media was wrong, and the White House was right. Still, many of us in the media won't admit it. Therefore, I'd like to apologize to you.
Why does the media do this, and why are we too proud to admit it? Who knows. Maybe it's because some of us just aren't that bright. Maybe it's because some of us are so hooked on drugs that we can no longer distinguish fact from fiction. And maybe it's because some of us are so downright crazy, and come from such awful upbringings, that we're a danger to ourselves.
Regardless of what it is, I'd like to apologize. And I'd like to be able to tell you we'll never do it again, but that's not true. We're already doing it again.
We're telling you the President's executive orders on immigration are illegal and unconstitutional. We're telling you his executive orders on immigration are "unprecedented." We're telling you the President's "thuggish, illegal" immigration moves are nothing more than a cynical effort to back Republicans into a political corner. We're telling you these things despite the fact that we all know the President's executive orders on immigration are legal; they are constitutional; and they're not unprecedented. In fact, there have been 40 executive orders on immigration issued since 1956, spanning every presidency from Eisenhower's to Obama's.
But why tell you that, when it's so much easier to peddle in lies, myths, and misinformation?
By the way, did we tell you that the President is deliberately letting Ebola into America as retribution for slavery? Because he is, you know!
So again, on behalf of the media, please accept my apology. Some of us aren't that bright, some of us are crazy, and some of us are downright delusional. Still, that's no excuse for dumping our issues on you. We owe you more, and we should probably make a better effort to report on facts, rather than run with assumptions and half-truths. We should probably make a better effort to understand policy, before we attempt to comment on it. And we should probably also admit, once and for all, that the President was born in America. But don't hold your breath.
Therefore, please America, accept my apology on behalf of the media. Hopefully, sometime soon, we'll start to get things right on a more consistent basis. Hopefully we'll start to report on facts, rather than myths. Hopefully we won't get so hung up trying to prove the President is lying to you that we ourselves end up getting caught in a lie. Hopefully we'll do all those things.
In the meantime, did you hear about how President Obama canned Chuck Hagel because he's hell bent on weakening our once mighty American military? It's true, you know!
Just ask the media.