To my best friend's girlfriend

We were once the closest of friends. We hung out together daily after school for lunch, texted and chatted about everything under the sky. We were inseparable, and school was made fun only because of you. The once jovial you, however, changed soon after I introduced you to him. Naive as I was, I never expected for two of my best friends to vibe so well and to grow even closer than what both of you were to me at first. Alas, after knowing him you experienced bouts of anxiety and depression, confiding me about your suicidal thoughts occasionally. I tried to break down your wall, to help you overcome the stress and worry that you were facing at that point in time. Despite my persistent attempts, you refused to see a counsellor. Refused to confide in your parents or in your teachers. Refused to help yourself. After a couple of months I realised both you and him had changed and become more similar to each other. I found myself being the only one shooting hoops at the basketball court. The only one staying back in school to study. The only one still listening to the Kpop songs that you once introduced to me. I found myself asking why? How could this be, if not for the both of you liking each other? Once, I awoke to a text from you telling our friend group that you had started dating him. My heart was filled with a pain that could not be described, somehow or rather I could not garner the strength to find the slightest ounce of joy for the both of you. The both of you were the two pillars holding up the sky that would constantly threaten to crash down on me. I could not afford to lose either of you, and it hurt me to the core just thinking of the possibility. When you informed me that it was just a dare that he had asked you to carry out, I was infuriated with him as how could a girl's relationship status be treated as a dare so easily? So carelessly? This would be, however, a premonition for what was to come later. About 3 months later, I sought to repair the friendship between you and me, noticing that you preferred to spend time texting him even when you were with me. I suggested for you to come out and study together at the library, but you said you had other plans, that you were going to meet him in person for the first time. It felt as if a bomb was dropped on me in that split second. What had happened to the earlier claims that you would never have the confidence to meet him in public, in person? I felt my world crashing down, that the inevitable was coming and I was trapped in a vacuum, my soul constricted and unable to breathe. As I cried myself to sleep that night, I sought to come to terms with the fact that as much as you had abandoned the friendship and drifted, I had to let you go. The next time we met after that day, the term had restarted and you for once decided to stay with me for lunch. On the way back from the mall to school, you checked your phone aimlessly and at the gate, informed me that the both of you were meeting again the coming weekend. As I enquired about how the first time with him went, you admitted that he was charming and that the both of you had drunk alcohol in one of the classrooms in the school. While at first I was fine with it, I soon realised the danger and risks that the both of you had gotten yourselves into. I confronted you and him about the risks and asked the both of you to promise me never to get yourselves into such danger again. While he saw the danger of it at first, you chose to protest against it and insisted that there was no danger in it. As the both of you remained online texting, he soon asked me what was the danger again and that he didn't see any danger. At that point, I knew it was over. As much as I enjoyed our friendship together, the memories that we made playing poker and going out shopping with our other friends, our morals were fundamentally too different. Asking me to accept this difference was too much, as it showed how much he had gotten infatuated with you such that he would swing to your side despite me telling him about the sexual risks posed. It was one thing for you to not love yourself and get yourself into trouble. It was another, for you to get him into danger and he and I had been the best of friends for 6 whole years, while you had only known him for 6 months. Soon after, you realised your mistake and tried to reconcile, but I had enough. I was determined to end the friendship forever, and I would shatter your heart if it meant letting the both of us move on. Soon after, the both of you met more frequently and I grew numb to everything that was transpiring. The day came when he confessed to you, and you agreed to be his girlfriend. While that was the final blow, I had seen it coming for months. During the holidays later on, even though he planned to go out with us, you cried due to your childish insecurities when he had to leave for the army. I hope you realise that in that week before he enlisted, 6 days were planned out for you with him only spending one with us. Even in that one day, half was spent with you and the other half that he could have spent with us was given to you because of your incessant flow of tears. I hated you for it, to be honest. I hated that you once called me needy, but now were insecure to such a point. I hated that I had lost my male best friend to you, that you chose to drift from me and made it a one-sided one. I never wanted it to end this way, for the relationship to go down in flames. It was never me, however, it was you and you to the end. It's alright, however, as I realised caring for the both of you only led to me being shut out and neglected and hence I have since moved on. I wish you all the best with him, that the both of you can last for as long as fate permits.