I just don't have the courage to say these things to you now, but probaby one day i will be the one who will send this to you.
I can clearly remember it was a month of september when we had our first hi and hello. I chatted you first and asked for your kakao id. I knew from the very first time i laid my eyes on you, that you are something. I mean, something that i've ever been looking for.
You were a gentleman, you never even doubted my motive why i'm chatting with you. You even spared almost all of your time chatting with me. You even shared that you were broken hearted that time and it's like we were in the same situtation. What the girl did to you, i also did to my ex. And we were like having goosebumps and saying "are you my ex!?"..
I can still remember how i helped you to move on, by not spoiling you that things will get better, just pursue her. Instead, i teased you, sending you link of the songs for broken hearted people that will make you cry, sending you quotes for you to realize that you should move on. I even sang you a song and you even praised me for my voice.
I can still remember everything... as if the flashback keeps playing and playing until it's eating my mind.
Things between us got even better, we were friends but we talked like lovers. We get along so well that sometimes i am thinking maybe we were meant to be.
You told me you like me, my personality, humor, and the way i smile. You always tell me i am beautiful, but i just don't believe you. I just thought that maybe you are like this because you're broken hearted. And a heart that is broken is vulnerable. I don't want to assume that we will be lovers. Because i don't want to experience heartache anymore.
Days passed but our communication is very strong, we planned to see each other when the time comes and i've been holding on to that promise.
And then you were gone for a month, but you told me where you were going and what will you do there, you even asked me to send you letter and even saying that you will surely miss me. My heartbeat skipped for a second and there am i. I cannot really deny the fact that i am falling for you. I even responded that i was gonna miss you too..
But then, just like a real girlfriend, i waited... days were like forever to me. I sent you letter once a week. I wanted to send you letters everyday but i restrained myself.
So one month has passed and you chatted me that you are back! Seeing your name appeared on my phone makes me excited. I feel elated when you called me "my" as if i am yours. And so, i get my hopes high. But i didn't think that was the start of the endless pain i am feeling right now.
We chatted on that day aggressively as if we are hungry for communication. But then by tomorrow, things changed. Goodnight and good morning message are not there anymore. I just thought maybe you were really tired or something that's why i took the initiative to text you first.
But then couple of days passed and nothing's changed. It somehow broke my heart in an instant. I initiated a conversation but it seems you were busy. But before, no matter how busy you were you always had the time to respond quickly.
