For The Girl Who Loves/Loved a Drug Addict

Subject: For The Girl Who Loves/Loved a Drug Addict
From: Annonomyous..
Date: 20 Nov 2015

It's okay, I promise.
I love a drug addict, and there is nothing I can do about it.

The mental abuse, the tearing down, the heartbreak, and the love that you don't want to destroy... I get it.
I was in a relationship with him for 4 years. On and off, he was doing Heroin... the big bad drug.
He was destroying himself. And it was destroying me.

I love him.
I loved him.
I don't know him.
I love him when he is sober.
I love him when he is high.
I don't know the difference anymore.

A relapse here, a relapse there...

Every relapse was found with the mental abuse. He tore me open, prodded at every wound.
I can't leave him like this...

I can't stay with him like this...

He's killing himself...
He's killing me...

I have always cared about people more than I cared about myself. I always put others before me.
I couldn't leave him.
If I did, what would happen to him?
If I didn't, what would happen to me?

I finally left him...

Do I hate him? Of course not.
Do I love him? I always will, just not the same.

You have to let go... You have to put yourself before others...

So, what do I do now? I can't stop caring... I can't stop loving..

Here's this...
Don't stop caring, don't stop loving.
Continue to care... about yourself!
Continue to love... YOURSELF!

You can't stop an addict...
You can't stop an addiction...
But, you CAN stop the mental abuse...

Does he really love you?
Is that really what love is?


I can get him help, I can help him.
Will I?
I'm not sure...

But, lets focus on me...

-The Healing Heart