Dear Alex, ( not his real name but close enough)
When we met online, I didn’t find you attractive. You really were not my type. However, You seemed smart, level headed, intelligent and the conversation was never lacking. I decided at that time, looks were not that important.
After talking extensively for a week, we decided to meet. I had doubts because of our age difference.....me being an older woman. I still didn’t want that to get in the way of meeting a ‘good’ person. I went with it. I really didn’t think I had anything to lose. I’m a good woman hopefully meeting a good guy. Also, after all our deep conversations and your constant good mornings and good nights, I thought you were quite different from the others I had been meeting. Who am I to judge because all my boxes aren’t checked off on my ideal mate list? Maybe he won’t come packaged the way I desired. I gave you a chance to look upon my face, enter my space and meet face to face.
Physically I was not enamored, but the first date was great! We talked and talked and though I paid for my own meal (that’s a whole different letter) I for once decided not to hold it against a date. And i accepted your request to meet again.
The next day you met me for the movies. This time you paid for the tickets. I respected that. However, you came with an attitude and no finesse. A lack luster double cheek Spanish kiss and a whole lot of negative energy. I still went with it. Maybe you had a family issue or something went wrong prior to you coming to meet me. Or maybe you were just mad you got the tickets? I told you you didn’t have to but you insisted. Anyhow, Mary Poppins it was! My choice of movie wasn’t available. I really wanted to see an Action film. I admit it wasn’t my type of movie to see at the theatre but I was happy to see something you wanted to. You asked me if I need popcorn, I declined and we proceeded to watch the movie. It wasn’t bad but again, not my type of movie to see at a theatre.
We sat in the theatre, tickets at the very front you said were a mistake. I told you it was ok we will make it work in the front row. It was quite a difficult watch but I’m not one to complain when someone does something nice for me. It just defeats the act of generosity.
A movie sat in complete silence. I’ve never been to a movie where the person next to me just ignored me the whole time. That was a bit strange I thought. Anyhow, you are your own person and so am I. I watched, got up for a snack mid way, asked if you needed anything and kept my grown woman face on. The movie ends.
We walk out, sorry no, you walked out ahead of me. Me lost between the crowd. Ok that’s weird! You don’t walk away from the woman you took to the movies. I’m now sensing that my intuition earlier was right and something is just immensely off. You asked if I liked the movie, i told you it was fine, started slow but ended ok for me. You said you loved it and this conversation was all too awkward for me. Then you tell me you have dinner plans in an hour. Lies! Last night we had everything planned and now dinner plans popped up? Well to your defense you had told me about these dinner plans prior to us meeting for the movies and I advised to cancel the movies but you insisted. I didn’t believe a word about you ‘dinner’ plans. I didn’t really want to go to the movies anymore but I didn’t want to disappoint either. So here we are awkwardly uncomfortable and you walking ahead of me and me thinking, why did I even give you the time of day? I walk you to the nearest station so you could go to your ‘dinner’ and I went home.
As I end this letter I just want you to know that at that moment when you did the basic two cheek kiss at the top of the stairs by the station I knew for sure I didn’t want to see you again....not in this capacity. However, I like the grown woman I am would have just had a conversation with you and ended things amicably. I sent you a message five minutes later telling you thanks for the movies but things were too awkward so let’s just be honest and be friends....keep it moving Positively. Maybe a slow friendship would be fine I thought. To my surprise maybe a minute later I was blocked and had one less friend on Facebook. Seems you were busy blocking me while I was messaging you. Are you a man or a mouse? What happened to everything you said the night before about me being the best date you had ever had and you wanting many more? Is it because I didn’t kiss you or go home with you?
Or is it because I expressed my desires for how I wanted to be treated on a first date? Whatever the reason, it has been done. Yes , I did go out of my way to message you to let you know what I really thought of your behavior! I wish you knew how to be a man. Age is nothing but a number but not in dating apparently. Goodbye, Happy Riddance Alex. Thank you for once more making my hopes of a good guy out there somewhere defunct with your Judas behavior. You didn’t succeed at being a gentleman or a decent human being but you did succeed at that.
The girl you deceived.