You came into my life in the least conventional way possible. A girl who sought an old love, to recover it when I was broken. I met you when before I knew I loved you because I was focused on fixing the love of my past. And you let me, despite your feelings.
You were young. I watched you turn the age of adulthood. I watched you struggle, grow, fall down and get back up. You watched the love i tried to rekindle flourish, blossom into a child, and flop in the months following. Looking back now, with the knowledge I have of your feelings then, when we were best friends and each other's rock, I'll never understand how you were able to stomach all those hours watching me rekindle a love when you wanted it So badly to be turned to you. I can never thank you enough for being so selfless, so young, to let me walk the path I needed to. Men double your age couldn't do that, and it's one of the many reasons why you inspire me to be better.
We weren't innocent. I held your hand on the sidelines of one of the most tragic moments in your life, and I was the first call after it was time for him to leave this life. We were practically inseparable before (besides the 6 months you left us for your work friend- I'll never forgive him for stealing you.) But from the bond we held from that time, We knew. My rekindled love was failing, on both of our parts, to stay rekindled. I tried but what was there in high school was diminished by past hurt for both of us, and the tighter we held on, the worse it became. We weren't innocent. People were hurt in our path to be with each other. We couldn't wait, and though it hurt people we loved, we couldn't help it. We tried. Almost a week we lasted, almost a week I cried for not having my best friend. When the thought of spending my life without you would send me into a frenzy of tears and anger and fear, I knew I couldn't have you any other way than my partner.
You're love is the love of dreams. It's the fairy tale love little girls dream about and adults swear doesn't exist. Your love carries me through the bad days, the good days, the emotionally draining days, and every day in between. Everything I've done in my past, everything I've ever done in every failed relationship, made sense when you started loving me. Everybody else wasn't you. Everybody else didn't love me the way you do.
To the man who made everything make sense: Thank you.
Thank you for loving me unconditionally, even when it's hard to.
Thank you for seeing through all my flaws and voicing why they make me perfect to you.
Thank you for making me feel beautiful.
Thank you for knowing me better than I know myself.
Thank you for taking the time out to learn how to deal with my brand of crazy, whether it be my Irish Aries temper or My moments of complete basket case crying fits over a commercial, or because I'm allowing my demons to win that day.
Thank you for loving me and my child the way you do.
Thank you for stepping up, growing up quicker than you thought you would have to, and sticking to it.
Thank you for never breaking a promise, And Thank you for fixing promises you had forgotten when you realized you had.
Thank you for being so selfless, and doing everything you do to make sure we are happy.
Thank you for sacrificing more than people realize for me.
Thank you for continuously growing into Everything I knew you could become.
Thank you for being there for me when I don't deserve it. Thank you for telling me you love me.
I always believed in soul mates. I believe they can come in the form of best friends, I believe not everybody gets to meet theirs. I'm incredibly lucky not only to find mine, but to have mine be my best friend, as well.
I promise to mirror the love you show me to the best of my ability. I promise to help you grow, to push you to succeed in what you want, to be your cheerleader through life. I promise to be next to you in every step you decide to take. I promise to prove to you that You're the one that changed me into a better person, to prove to you that you make this crazy life make sense. I promise to protect you, to make you proud to have me. I promise to never let anyone hurt you- and I'm apologizing now to any family member that may get the brunt of that promise. This man, the one that makes everything make sense, is the most amazing man I've ever met. And I will die before I let someone hurt him and stay silent about it.
To the man who makes everything makes sense- Thank you for sending the fog away.
Yours, and nobody else’s..
-K
