To My Ex

Subject: To My Ex
Date: 23 Dec 2015

I would like to thank you. For the vast majority of our relationship, you made me feel inferior. It seemed as though nothing I did was ever good enough. You put tremendous pressure on me to do things that I just was not ready for. You never made me feel loved. I felt like more of an inconvenience to you than anything. When you told me that you felt we needed to take a break, you put the entire blame on me. I wasn't doing the things you felt I needed to be doing or was not acting the way you felt I needed to be acting. Though you never physically put your hands on me, your words hurt just as badly. The moment I said yes to being your girlfriend, the flirting stopped. There were no more compliments and saying "I love you" (or rather you texting "love ya") felt forced. Everything in that relationship felt forced. I smiled as I made the decision to break up with you. We had not talked or seen each other for weeks and you seemed to think that was okay. But now, I have someone who loves me, in every sense of the word. I feel happy every time I see him, even after over 10 years. We're not actually in a real relationship, but I feel more love from him in the past 7 months we have been "together" than I ever felt from you. He is my best friend. He raises me up rather than pulling me down, and I do the same in turn. He makes me happy. When I was with you, I spent more time miserable and unhappy in the 2 1/2 years we were together than I spent being happy. It took me some time, but I finally realized that what you and I had was an unhealthy relationship. But I thank you. Because of how you acted toward me, I was able to tell when someone truly loves me. I know what it's like to feel happy and wanted. I have someone who is my rock, and if it hadn't been for how miserable I was with you, I wouldn't know what it's like to have that.

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