Lifestyle

Dear Compulsive Liar, We get it. You need the attention. You crave it. You need to be needed. You yearn for the admiration of others. Maybe you can’t control it. Perhaps, just perhaps, you don’t just do it out of enjoyment. The stories you concoct are for anyone with ears. They’re for anyone who is willing to listen. Perhaps it was something that happened when you were younger. Perhaps, you just weren’t given the attention you thought you deserved as a child. Perhaps, the opposite is true. Perhaps, just perhaps, you had so much that you took it all for granted – and felt invincible. You put on a show. You’re a magician. You’re a master of your craft. Your customers are temporary friends. They buy tickets, and buy into a friendship that they believe is real...
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Dear Arvind, In the National Council meeting held on the March 28, in your Convenor's address, instead of giving a review of the party's situation and the path ahead, you chose to launch an attack on Yogendra Ji, my father and me, making all sorts of false and inflammatory allegations against us. Your speech incited several Delhi MLAs- (who were invited despite not being members of the NC) to scream that we were "gaddars" who should be thrown out, and behave in the manner of hooligans. Such was the ferocity of the mob of these MLAs and others as they rushed towards my father, that he felt that he may not get out of this alive. You did not even allow us to respond to your allegations. Immediately after your speech, in the middle of shouting and screaming by MLAs and others, Manish...
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Dear O’Connor Family, We regret the nasty Yelp reviews, mean emails, and crank phone calls your pizzeria suffered earlier this week after announcing it would not cater any gay weddings. We also regret that you felt threatened and, as a result, were forced into hiding. Please know that the individuals responsible for making you feel that way do not reflect the LGBT community as a whole. We do not wish you any harm or ill will. Our wishes are the same as yours: To live peacefully and in harmony with those around us in a world free of judgement, hate, and discrimination. As we approach Easter Sunday, we’re calling on you, O’Connor family, to do what Jesus H. Christ asks of all true Christians and share your blessings with others by donating the nearly three quarters of a million dollars...
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Dear amazing nursing breasts, It is with a heavy heart that I bid you farewell, my beloved C-cups. My daughter is 14 months old now, and our breastfeeding relationship will soon be coming to an end. Yes, the two of you are slowly drying up, practically reduced to your pre-pregnancy shapes (ish) and sizes. Also known as barely B-cups. Hardly a handful. Nearly non-existent. My shirts are already starting to fit awkwardly, with no more milk left to fill them out. I remember mid-way through my pregnancies when bras started getting snug. It was such a novel feeling for me, a late bloomer who was thrilled to graduate from A to B cups in college. Then, when my milk finally came in after delivery? Holy bazongas! None of my shirts fit. (And not because of my post-pregnancy belly, which...
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Dear Katie, Earlier today it came to my attention that you had tweeted your opinions about depression – the biggest mental health issue that faces this country, bar your ignorance. Many believe that the opinions you spout are nothing more than a cry for attention much like when a dog defecates for the attention of its owner, which ironically is a form of separation anxiety. When I read your tweets I was not surprised that you had decided to shit on the floor in the hopes of a reaction – Something you have done many times and will probably continue to do until you fade away into obscurity. Unfortunately this is not the Big Brother house so you cannot be voted out and we cannot turn you down as you did to Lord Alan Sugar – because, like a bad smell you return to fill the nose of...
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Dear Amitabh Bachchan, The nation watched in awe as you urged viewers to breathe in a bit of Gujarat, adorning the colourful look of a Rabari tribal, wandering through a moonlit Rann of Kutch. Your campaign as ambassador for Gujarat Tourism is said to have pushed up traffic to the state’s iconic destination by huge margins. Shot over 17 destinations across three years, your Khushboo Gujarat Ki campaign, I am told, has proved to be a turning point for the state’s tourism industry. However, unknown to many, the same Rann of Kutch where you shot this ad campaign is today in peril. A road is being constructed here, which will slice through the world’s largest breeding site for the graceful pink flamingoes that flock here every year. The greater flamingoes come here in the hundreds during...
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Dear Mr. Bunch: On a recent web-surfing expedition, we came across a page for GE Media Relations. The page, located in an area of the site reserved for business news and press releases, includes contact information for you -- including your business and home telephone numbers in Connecticut. Now that is pretty gutsy -- allowing your home phone number on a web page so that any nutcase can call you at all hours, whether or not you screen your calls. In fact, the APJ staff debated whether or not to call you this weekend, preferably at as inconvenient a time as possible for you: the middle of the barrage of GE commercials during The McLaughlin Group. Thankfully, we were spared The McLaughlin Group this weekend. Unfortunately, this was a result of the coverage surrounding the...
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Dear Jennifer, I write to you as a long-time admirer of your outstanding professionalism, and your enthusiastic commitment and devotion to the arts communities especially in the areas in which I operate, the digital media industries. As I have been involved in many major public initiatives in digital media, across government, industry, commerce, and culture, for over a decade I feel that I am at least qualified to offer you, with every due respect, my professional perspective on the proposed changes at the Australia Council concerning "new media" art. I strongly and sincerely believe that a commitment to a formal, specific, new media entity within the Australia Council, explicitly denominated as such and with a dedicated budget for funding "new media" initiatives, is absolutely...
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Dear Frank (Hay) and colleagues, Thank you for your open letter, and please forgive the delay in replying. My position on the Viking Energy project is as follows: I support it. Why? Shetland is one of the most fossil-fuel dependent communities on earth; this is one of the reasons it is so expensive to live here; that, as well as the wider considerations of slowing the rate of climate change (and thus of rising sea-level), is a very good reason to be in favour of renewable energy. Although I have been a long-term supporter of onshore wind power, my support has not been and is not uncritical or automatic. I have seen badly designed wind farms in other parts of the world. Some of them are deplorable and it is hard to understand why or how they got planning permission. I have also...
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Dear Southern Baptist Family: Greetings in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ! These are days in which the Lord is richly blessing the ministry of New Orleans Baptist Theological Seminary. We have the largest student enrollment in our history, the most diverse faculty in our history and the happiest spirit I can recall during my twenty-five years of life on the campus. However, we regret deeply that these are also days in which tension clouds the relationship between some leaders of the Baptist General Convention of Texas and the Southern Baptist Convention. Unfortunately, in such an atmosphere of misunderstanding and mistrust, the positions of others are sometimes misreported or misrepresented. This makes it all the more crucial in such a day to tell the truth plainly...
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