Lifestyle

Dear Tracey: Although many readers here in America might not remember you as half of the English pop duo Everything But the Girl, I bet they can still sing along with your group's smash 1995 Billboard hit "Missing" whenever it comes on Muzak at the GAP or TJMaxx. Since you have given up touring for the domestic life, it wouldn't be hard to imagine you shopping there, too -- with your three kids in tow, hands full of housewares and half-price denim. You would likely go unrecognized, unless of course you opened your mouth to sing the chorus of "Driving" or "Apron Strings" with that voice of yours. I once wrote that your singing was "the aural equivalent of mother's milk," a description I'm sure you find treacly. Tracey Thorn's Bedsit Disco Queen. Photo by Kristi York Wooten. Bedsit...
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Dear Adam, After reading Aaron Hicklin's open letter, I felt compelled to summarize and add a few more of my own suggestions on how you might further prove your "gayness" to the "gay community" (the gay community, of course, being defined as a monolithic entity of one heart and one mind). It is my hope that said suggestions will allow you to eventually break the chains of a record company that has controlled so many of your decisions over the past several months. I like you, Adam, I really do. That is why I freely offer these pearls of wisdom on how to celebrate, not dilute, the purity of your sexual identity. As an openly gay man, you must be "unapologetically flamboyant" at all times. No going "hetero," or "stripped down," even if it's for a Motown song. For the love of man,...
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Hey Ladies, I wanted to say thank you. All three of you admirable women are outspoken, powerful, talented, and living your lives on your terms. Somehow, in the year 2013, that last one is still difficult. Women are still shaking off the shackles of oppression from all angles, still unsheathing themselves from the mighty patriarchy, and oh my, is it a heavy cloak. I hope the honesty and hard-won lessons in these letters are being ingested by others the way they have by me, an early-30s songwriter, musician, mother, and unknown folksinger. You could say I tried to use my sexuality to sell music in my early days. I was 23 and living in my car, driving mad circles around the country playing coffee shops, colleges, backyards and bars, armed with pink tinged blonde hair, a loud untrained...
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Dear Millenials, Your reputation precedes you. What I hear from the media is that you're ill-equipped for the real world. You've been raised by helicopter parents, and you can't cope with the possibility of failure or starting at the bottom of the totem pole. I hear your eyes never leave your phones, and your young men have spent so much time playing video games they lack the social skills to date and marry. I hear you're living in your parents' basements, watching reality TV, and waiting for the perfect job to land in your lap. But the real you? The Millennials I talk to every day? You're nothing like that. You're inspired, hopeful, energetic. You've thrown your souls into your work -- packing your cars to the gills, moving to new cities, and crashing on couches to pursue God...
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Dear 5 Seconds of Summer, I have nothing against you. I think your accents are pretty rad, your passion for music admirable and your creativity coveted. However, as a female teenage girl, I am deeply offended by your "Good Girls" music video. I'm 17 years old, a senior from a nameless small town. Despite humble beginnings, a fire has been lighted in my heart that one day that I'd be able to rise above my circumstances and make a name for myself. I unashamedly work hard for my goals. I take five AP classes, have a 4.6 grade point average, hold six internships and received an 1800 on my SAT. To me, the dark circles under my eyes and my need for caffeine represents my chance at achieving success, following my dreams, and pursuing my purpose. As I struggle against the societal pressure...
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Dear Truman, You have reached a milestone, and I am sorry. A few short weeks ago, you had little in the way of separation anxiety. Mommy or I would put you in your crib and you'd mewl for a minute, maybe two. After that you'd think, "Oh, what the heck? I'm tired. Might as well go to sleep and not bother with all the noise." And that was that. Now, not only are you aware of being left behind, but you know all too well what happens to Mommy and Daddy at bedtime. You are aware that after laying you down, we exit through a door. Maybe you always saw this, but now you realize it. Therein is the difference. This new consciousness, combined with your recent attempts to crawl, has led to a wonderfully sad, heartbreaking period for you. The other night, I placed you in your...
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Dear Dr. Stephen Joel Trachtenberg, I usually take great pride in calling myself an alumna of The George Washington University -- but not today. You made comments on the Diane Rehm Show this week about how college women drinking too much is feeding the campus rape crisis, and in doing so you perpetuated the dangerous notion that it is a woman's fault for being sexually assaulted or raped. It is disturbing to think that as the former president of GWU, current president emeritus and a professor of public service, this is how you view college rape culture. But it's not surprising. What was she drinking? What was she wearing? How was she walking? How was she talking? These are the questions that often get asked, as if a man's decision to sexually violate a woman is somehow the...
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Dear President Obama and every Congressperson, Senator, and presidential candidate, As I was indulging in my morning ritual of sipping a cup of coffee and reading the news, I came across an article that hit me with a wave of nausea faster than some of you swing a nine iron on the golf course. New research was released saying that the top 1 percent of student loan borrowers have loans of more than $150,000. Rep. Paul Ryan also launched a plan that will hit poor students the hardest by wanting to cut Pell Grants. My relaxing coffee break quickly came to a halt, but I've had a lasting pit in my stomach ever since reading that article. Immediately, I launched into panic mode. I racked my brain for options. Drop out of graduate school? Respond to the typo-ridden post looking for...
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Dear Son, We imagine that, by now, you are very tired but also very proud of all that you've accomplished in your group. We are so proud of you -- simply based on our imaginings about what kinds of things you've experienced. And, we always loved being on solo, too -- so it's nice for us to thinking of you there... in your little space within such huge, unlimited spaces. A few sort of cerebral words... something sticky for your brain to chew on. Just this: it's good to take some time to rest and reflect. We know you think a lot (a LOT) but reflecting is sort of different... and probably you already know how, but if not, then reflecting is when you just let ideas or random feelings pass through your mind very lightly -- so you can examine them with curiosity but not too tight focus...
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Dear Texas State Board of Education, I've been following the "liberal-hysteria" that's ensued since you approved those social studies curriculum changes last week, and as someone who received nearly my entire compulsory education -- grades 2-12 -- in the Texas public schools system, I must admit that I don't understand what all the fuss is about, particularly with regard to the following points: The separation of church and state. Have any of the people who've gotten their panties in a wad over this ever been to a Friday afternoon pep rally? Or a school-sponsored lock-in? A graduation ceremony? Or a Texas high school football game... where being led in evangelical Christian prayer is considered standard pre-game ritual? Separation of church and state?! In Texas, church is state. So...
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