Dearest Love,
We have known each other for a while now and I would like to believe that we both have respect towards each other. But it seems as if I am incredibly wrong, you don't respect and I'm not sure if you ever did. You ignore me in every way until you need or want something, I'm just convenient for you. I ask myself many times throughout the day "why am I still with him? And why is he still with me when he sees uninterested?" Well the answer is obvious, I am still with you because I truly do love you and you're still with me because I do everything for you.
You see, things were never like this until recently. You used to hang on to every word I said along with doing as much as you could for me or helping me with things. I'm not sure what happened to make it all change and...
Broken Hearts
Hello Dii!
You have a wonderful smile and a magnetic voice. Had I not been so deeply mystified by your sister, you would have been my cynosure and not her. I write these pleasantries to you only hoping that you do not confuse my compliments for flattery.
And I write to you for you have demeaned my hopes and faith in you, in ways beyond repair.
You don't know me well, but trust me when I say I share equal excitement and joy for her wedding tomorrow. My heart overflows with constant well-wishes and small prayers, and it has been so for some time now - I believe you would relate to this.
Even I have had random outbursts of tears in the past few days, just like you did the other day, and like you would do tomorrow.
One of the reasons for my tears is for the fact that she will...
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You'll almost certainly never read this, but I need to write it anyway. For myself. For my own mental well-being.
The first time I saw you, a few days after I had started the job, it was like those cheesy movies I never took seriously. Everything around you faded for a moment and I could have sworn you were glowing. My world was rocked. I already had an amazing boyfriend, and for 3 years up until that point, no guy had made me question the relationship even a little bit. I really couldn't complain, it was nearly a textbook-perfect relationship. And then, I saw you.
My next thought was, "He's probably an ass anyway." And so, I avoided you accordingly.
I kept that thought at the forefront of my mind for as long as I could, despite moments of weakness some nights where I'd look up...
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Today I read an article about the things teens are scared of their parents finding out. Their fears were things like being bullied via social media, the stress they are under in terms of school and grades, their daily lives and pressures they feel are trying to drown them. This article got me thinking about what things are going on in my own life that I am constantly trying protect my parents from.
You see, I am a twenty-one year old college student. I have moved out of my parents house and I’m (for the most part) financially self-sufficient. I’m a full time student, a junior, at a state university. I work part time. I’m a mentor and an active volunteer in the community. I have some of the greatest friends I could ever ask for. And yet, I hide so many pieces of my life from my parents...
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Dear U KNOW WHO YOU R,
So, four months down the line from the Discovery Day and a month and a bit since publishing my first letter to you I decided to re-read it. Retrospectively, I can see there were a lot of anger, bitterness and hurt in me, not surprising though. I was a bit naive and emotional and raw, asking endless questions and blaming you for everything. Your reasons for having an affair with my husband are only known to you and I have no desire to find them out anymore.
At the time it felt easier to put the blame on you because if I blamed him I would have hated him to the point of no return. I was not ready to do this, as deep down I still loved him and couldn’t imagine my life without him. But now I understand that you did not make him do anything he didn’t want to do,...
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Dear U KNOW WHO YOU R,
So, four months down from the Discovery Day and a month and a half after publishing my first letter to you I decided to re-read it. Retrospectively, I can see there were a lot of anger, bitterness and hurt in me, not surprising though. I was a bit naive and emotional and raw, asking endless questions and blaming you for everything. Your reasons for having an affair with my husband are only known to you and I have no desire to find them out anymore.
At the time it felt easier to blame everything on you because if I blamed him I would have hated him to the point of no return. I was not ready to do this, as deep down I still loved him and was not prepared to let him go. But now I understand that you did not make him do anything, he chose to be unfaithful and...
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There is no emptier feeling then the feeling of loving someone who will never love you back.
I gave you my heart and soul but that wasn’t enough for you. Nothing I do will ever be enough.
No guy before you made me feel the way you did. You gave me a sense of comfort that I had never felt before. It was as though we had known each other for a lifetime. You knew my insecurities and flaws and you accepted them. You accepted me. You made me feel wanted.
You told me I was beautiful. You made me feel like I was special; like I was different from all the other girls before me. You made me believe that you actually cared about me. You made me promises of a future. You said all the right things at the right time. I was naive then. I believed all of your empty promises. I think that deep down...
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My Wedding Day
Today, April 15 2017... I had a dream. I dreamed of my Wedding Day.
I'm writing this down, because after all the dreams and nightmares that I had, this one was the longest and most memorable dream I had ever had. Why? Because this was about a dream of a man named "Bobby". My Ex-boyfriend that I know I will never get over with...
Of all the dreams I had about this guy, this was the only dream of him that felt so real. It felt so real it was like I was living in another life where everything actually happened. I felt all the emotions and physically touches in that dream, even when I woke up. All of those feelings lingered throughout the day, repeating those images in my head, repeating all those words in my head as well.
To start... What was in that dream? To...
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March 10, 2012… I remember the feeling like it was yesterday. My stomach was in knots, I felt like I was going to vomit and my stress level was maxed out. Between the decorations, the rehearsal, the dresses, hair.... and the fact that I had gained weight and my dress didn't fit properly anymore definitely didn't help things. I remember being to the point of tears by the time the night was over. I remember everyone reassuring me that the details didn't matter because I was still going to be married to the love of my life by the end of the next day. They were right! (I thought)...
I remember lying in bed that night, still stressing, thinking of all of the things that we still had to do, what time I had to be at the church the next morning. "Did I tell everyone what time to be there? Did...
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The day you first texted me, or hit me up; I thought it was weird. Little did I know we would be here. We started to talk almost everyday and it was good. No one ever gave me that kind of attention before; I felt needed, loved, and cared for. I knew a lot of my friends and family cared and loved me, obviously; but I never felt the kind of affection you gave me. It was new, it was scary, it was worth it, at the time. Something about you had me hooked. You were like a drug I was slowly getting addicted to. We talked every night. I would facetime you or you would facetime me, and we would talk endlessly or until one of us fell asleep. This kind of attention I had never felt before. It was good, at the moment. Little did I know, you showed that kind of attention to every body. You told me I...
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