My whole life I had been searching for someone who would love me and make me complete. Yet every time I found the guy who might be the one, He always ended up leaving. I thought of it as a curse that no matter what I do no guy I fall for will ever stay. And boy I fell for you hard. So naturally I expected you to leave, Which you tried to do just before I begged and begged for one week to change your mind. It had finally dawned on me what I'd been doing wrong and I finally know what had to be done. But it was too late. I'd pushed you away. So even though you agreed to give me a week to change your mind, I couldn't make it passed 2 days. I knew that that week wasn't what you wanted and it killed me to trap you for longer than I already had, so I told you goodbye. I got the answers I needed.
Do you want to be with me?
Are you sure?
Then please don't come back looking to try this again. Let me heal. You've been sure before and its only been a repeat so please stay away.
And then I let you walk. I let you leave me crying in a stairwell begging you in my mind to turn around and come back to me. I let you go, and I stayed behind. I didn't run after you like I wanted to and I didn't ask you to come back into my room that night for one last time. I didn't beg you to reconsider, or tell you that it took everything in me to let you go. I simply let you walk away from everything we were and could have had.
That night I let the ache rule my heart and the tears flow freely. But I won't cry over you again because if you ever loved me at all You'll never ask to get me back again which means you'll never get the chance to make me.
I'm sorry we didn't work out because believe me I wanted it all with you, but I refuse to trap you in my cage if you'd rather fly free. Our time together and our final split made me realize something very important. My insecurities are partly why you didn't fall for me entirely. My cage was the problem. So I've come to terms with the fact that I have to get out of it too. My cage has kept me imprisoned where I cannot follow those I love and that's why they have to leave. So thank you for helping me to see that. Maybe one day when I am flying so high I can't see the ground I'll find a guy who can understand that sometimes I will still visit my cage and can help me to lessen the visits. A guy who will do what you didn't want to. Stay. I'm sorry if you ever do want me back (you've been known to come back every few weeks) but i'm working on me. And when I'm free, I will be flying to high and to fast for you to reach anymore. You may be the one that got away, but that doesnt mean I need you back.