My Open Letter to Summer

Subject: My Open Letter to Summer
From: The Mom
Date: 23 Oct 2015

Dear Summer,

You have finally arrived! We have waited for you to get here since our Christmas break. After a year of too many illnesses and too many school projects, we were overjoyed to start counting the days until your arrival. You bring us hope, joy and mornings where we can sleep late. You bring us long evening walks, late night movies and trips that can last longer than a weekend. We love when you show up and every one feels a very heavy burden lifted from their shoulders. In fact, I could go as far as saying you are our favorite time of year.

However, I do have a few requests while you are here.

First, could you please keep the temperature and/or heat index below 100 degrees? I am not sure I can deal with my kids whining about how hot they are as they lie around the house on my furniture looking and smelling like dirty laundry. It gets old fast. That doesn’t even begin to touch on the fact that when I tell them to go outside, they are risking heat stroke by doing anything more strenuous than breathing. I know we live in the South, but can you see about cooling things off a bit?

Secondly, I know that with your arrival the bedtimes are adjusted because no one has to be up at 6:00am. However, I am not fond of the stay up all night and sleep all day pattern that you tend to bring with you. I know that it is common for teenagers to like to sleep but it really does get old listening to movies and video games until the wee hours of the morning while I am tucked into my cozy bed early. (A mom needs her sleep, you know!) Maybe just an extra hour at night and maybe two in the morning would work. I know it technically is not your fault that they become night owls but something about your arrival takes their internal clocks and resets them for “nocturnal creature” mode. I appreciate anything you can do. Perhaps you can arrange for an early bird singing on their window sill every morning around 9:00am? That would be great! (And I will be sure to hide all rocks and objects that could possibly hurt this early bird.)

Third, is there some way you can adjust your image so that Summer Fun is equated to free? Sure, I would love to hang out in cool movie theaters or enjoy the thrill of a water park every day but until I find that money tree growing in our backyard, I just don’t see that happening. Perhaps Summer Fun can equal reading or playing board games with your siblings. Oh, I know that is asking a lot of you seeing as you have always been known for brain rotting fun, but a book now and then can be just as fun. (At least for my wallet.)

Finally, (and this is my biggest request of all of them), is it at all possible to cut down on the enormous appetites you tend to bring with you? It seems as if I am barely home from the grocery store before the pantry and refrigerator are bare and the kids start asking for something to eat. I have no problem feeding my beloved offspring, yet the appetites that are never satisfied are going to send me straight to the poor house. I do have two teenage boys, you know. They eat a lot. Often. And always want more. Is it at all possible to maybe use the heat you have brought and the lethargy that it brings to kill the beastly appetites of these kids? At least a little? I would appreciate it. Being known at my local grocery store by name because I am there every day is not my idea of a dream come true.

Again, we are thrilled you have finally arrived. We do love you and love the freedom you bring. I just need your help on these few things in order for all of us to come out of it with our sanity in tact.

With much love and adoration (and appreciation if you can help out),

The Mom

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