In my almost two years really knowing Jesus, I've seen a few girls going back to the world for love, and I've always thought that they must be crazy, how could you not want a Jesus-loving-God-Fearing-Spirit-Filled-Man and yes I know you guys are out there, I've seen you!! But to be very honest without the intention of stereotyping ALL YA'LL or offending you. I must admit my heart is shattered by what I've seen.
Yes I am also guilty of saying no to relationship proposals because there is no intense feeling of attraction and wanting to get to know someone. But it seem that these "Godly Men" get so puffed up with their idea of a Godly Woman, that they can't even see Christ's masterpiece, His Princes, His daughter standing in front of him wanting to get to know him, wanting to worship with him, to learn from him and pray with him. They reject the simple looking, awkward saying, nice ones and try to look for a woman that Solomon describes in the Bible.
I get that everyone has a certain standard or liking but the very least some guys could do is not make a girl feel so " not good enough", even though I don't want a romantic relationship with any of the amazing Godly guys at my Church or in my life I still treat them with so much respect and sisterly love. I never make them feel that they are not worthy of my love.
I know most people think Christian girls have it all figured out waiting on God's timing, never feeling uncertain or alone or wondering about the future. Unfortunately we were raised where society imprinted the idea of "crazy, stupid, love" and romantic movies into our humanity and saved or not, no matter what race, gender, religion or social standard one is, every single person strives to find one thing: LOVE!!!
And in a social setup where when being normal its hard to find someone to love you, one can imagine how hard it must be for sold out Jesus loving girls!!
I recently had coffee with a AMAZING Godly Man/Guy, we talked non-stop about Jesus, we laughed and even shed a tear, our intentions for coffee was not to date but to meet a fellow Christian with the same heart for serving a certain nation. He sent a very nice text afterwards and it made me feel so worthy of knowing someone that is so beautiful inside and out. We saw each other a few more times, and every time he was such a gentleman, making me feel like I am not saying stupid things, which I know I am, because he makes me so nervous, reason being he is so beautiful and filled with my True Love Jesus.
Everything he was saying was out of trying to be nice and good mannered, which I thank him for, but I felt so sad knowing that I would not be able to find a husband like that!! I secretly hoped he would think I am the type of woman he would like to marry, after a while I realised that if girls like me, on fire, good heart intended, love radical,plain looking, nervous babbling girls like me don't marry a mediocre church going guy, we'll marry our ex-boyfriends who made us feel dirty and unworthy BC.
I now understand why girls go back to the worldly love. It does make you feel wanted when the Godly Men don't see you fit.
I don't really want to say anything to the Godly men out there, just that charm is deceptive and beauty fades, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. Don't look at the girl who is saying she loves Jesus look at the one showing she loves Jesus. How she treats little kids, old people, social misfits and most of all sinners!! Her eyes and smile when she speaks about Him, the intensity she worships Him, and if she has the ability to lead you in to a more intimate beautiful relationship with Christ!!
I hope the man that was supposed to read this did, that girl, that's just okay, might just be your Lily among the roses without you noticing!!