Family

Dementia.... I hate you. More than hate, I despise you. I want to yell at you and make you give it back. I am sitting here holding the hand of a man who no longer knows me. The man you are taking from me. The man you are taking from us. I try to connect through memories that only I hold now. Those that he remembers never involve me. He does not know me. His daughter. How can he not know me? How can he not know my stories of us. My best stories of us. My defining moments of lessons learned. The man who taught me strength, courage , fight. The man who taught me how to push past adversity. I hate you dementia. I hate how somedays you pull my family together and others your wedge it apart. We focus on blame, anger and fear for something we can no longer...
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Dear Parents/Families, I promise, we college officials are not trying to confuse you or throw you off your game. And yet I completely understand your feeling that way, particularly as you keep telling me that you feel that way! You attend the orientation meetings and read the Parent/Family Handbook and, after we pummel you with words "privacy" and "FERPA", it's no wonder that you walk away feeling like we don't want any contact with you. Not true! The most supportive scenario possible is the one in which students, their families and college personnel work together in partnership. But in order to make that vision come to pass, you and I need to work on our phone conversations. If I may, here are some suggestions on the opening lines with which you habitually call me and how we can...
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Dear Sulemans (or is it Suelmen?), I know you are all very busy right now, what with caring for 14 children, and publicly feuding in the press, so I'll keep this short. Two words: family counseling. Two more: get some. The fact that Nadya decided to have a litter of children, despite the fact she cannot afford them, or adequately care for them, is neither here nor there. These children are here now, and have to be cared for -- all 14 of them. Me making points about the moral ramifications of their births, or questioning if the doctors who created them were absent the day they taught ethics at medical school are neither here nor there. That goes for anyone else arguing those points right now. The important thing now is making sure these children are cared for, and, for better or for...
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Cherish the days. Brace yourself. It gets more and more awesome ... but then it gets harder too. With every ounce of laugh, you must understand that it reciprocates the tears too. Please be strong. Hate will be a constant thing. The bad will be inevitable ... But we will be okay. Always. As long as we stay sane by being insane. As long as we continuously learn how to shrug things off ... We will be A-okay. I'm sorry we're not going to be the things that we wanted to be I'm sorry that you have to hear mom say those things I'm sorry that you have to find out tons of crap which will test every single thing That you thought you knew ... I'm sorry that we will never learn how to talk back, And you must never talk back. We did one time ... mom almost cried. It wasn't...
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Dear Dad, I write to you not only as your daughter, but as one of many daughters who know the unique intricacies of the lessons only their fathers could teach them. I write to you because out of every helping hand I have received in this world, you receive the least amount of credit and praise for the things you do. You've always stood back and let me shine, only stepping in when I call for you knowing you can't be more than a short distance away. It's time I use these words to pull you and every other remarkable father into the light you so deserve to be seen in. It's time that light radiates on the genuine and extraordinary love only you could have shown me. A father teaches his daughter many lessons about what it means to truly love and experience this life. One of the most...
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I Am Angry. I have done everything for my daughter from her first haircut, potty training, pageant, day at dance, school, etc. The only first you truly have had with my daughter is her first year of life. Do you ever sit and think to yourself how selfish you truly are? Do you even realize the damage you have done not just to my daughter, but to your other children and family members? Do you continue to sit and blame my husband and me for your absence in my daughter’s life? Is it an easier way to explain to others why she is not around? Does it make you feel better to lie to everyone? Can we get something straight we took you to court for a reason. We gave you many warnings and you thought it was all a game. You were on a self-destructive path and hanging around the wrong people and...
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I spent this night shivering and laughing under a clear, cold sky full of stars with people I love just to witness something beautiful. We mooned the moon and laughed ourselves hoarse, and I'm so incredibly grateful for every silly second. I came to a realization this year that I feel compelled to share here, for whomsoever may need it: Avoiding fear, sadness or anger is not the same thing as being happy. I live my sadness every day, but I don't resent it anymore. Instead, I do it now so that the wonderful moments of joy I do find are not in order to forget, but to inhabit and enjoy for their own sake. It's not easy. In fact, I'd say it takes much more effort to consciously do than it does to just stay sad, but with all my heart, I cannot tell you how worth it it is. And for those...
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As seen in Mamalode Dear Bubbe, I never intended to do it; really. One second it was a quivering icon, the next it was gone. Just. Like. Magic. Honestly, it brought on a smile. I’m not trying to be mean. Chalk it up to a Mommy epiphany, a moment of clarity. The day I deleted Minecraft, I liberated myself and you of a virtual, addictive burden. Pressing that shaky, little X ushered you back to real life. That made me happy. In the beginning, I was a fan. Compared to the other choices the video game world has to offer, I could see why you wanted to tap the piggy bank to invest in one that requires players to scavenge for resources, earn survival treasure, design landscapes, construct villages, and defend against intruders. As a lifelong rock collector, forager of...
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17 year old marriages are few and far between these days, and for mine I am extremely grateful and lucky. Our courtship of nine months and first three months of marriage were heaven on Earth. But then Uncle Sam decided that they wanted my "cooperation" and could not take "no thank you" for an answer. That is when the "for better or worse" clause kicked in, and my innocent wife began enduring a life of hell on Earth. A law abiding Canadian girl who never even got a parking ticket before was now seeing and feeling the ugly fear and intimidation of a corrupt government. Where and how we met was very special but that story is a book or movie material. We both knew we were meant to meet on that fateful day abroad. It started with nasty calls that threatened to kill our family when she was...
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My sweet Kiera, Now that I've brought you back to school after lunchtime, it's finally sinking in, your actually in school!! There's are so many emotions today.. I'm so happy, proud and excited for you. But, not too long ago there was a time when I didn't know if I would get to do this special thing with you, and I'm so thankful that I am. As nervous as I am, I know you're ready, I know you'll jump into school with the same excitement, curiosity and energy that you approach life with. School is going to teach you so much, you're going to make so many friends, how could you not? You're funny, out-going, compassionate and kind. You amaze me every single day. I hope you learn to love books like me and your Aunt Kassandra, books can be your best friends at times. I hope you learn...
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